The chart above shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time.

The chart above shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time.
This
bar chart depicts the figure of men and women in higher
education
in Britain in three intervals and whether they were studying
full
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full-time
show examples
time
education
or
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
education
. It is clear from the graph that
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
education
always dominated
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
time
education
.
According to
what is shown,
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
education
in men chart started from a Thousand and
then
dipped slightly to around 850 after which
finally
it took place at approximately 900 thousand.
Mans
Correct your spelling
Men
show examples
who committed to a
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
time
education
, their figures had been increased throughout the period.
Female
Fix the agreement mistake
Females
show examples
considering
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
education
,
on the other hand
, consistently increase through all intervals .
Moreover
, the same description
applicable
Add a missing verb
is applicable
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
time
education
which gradually
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
till it
reached
Wrong verb form
reaches
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of 200 thousand.
To sum up
, comparing both men and women,
mans
Correct your spelling
men
show examples
consider
to be
Change the verb form
being
show examples
less than
Correct article usage
the numbers
show examples
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
of
womens
Correct your spelling
women
show examples
When we analyze
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
education
while
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
time
education
can be taken into account as they are the same approximately.
Submitted by sultanalya7yawi on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words education, time, part with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.

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