New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantage

#technologies #children #time #outweigh

Nowadays, the development of technology is becoming increasingly popular.

This

gradually changes the activities which

children

do in their free time. Despite some obvious disadvantages of

this

trend. I believe that these are outweighed by advantages. On the one hand, technologies have an adverse effect on

children

's physical and mental health.

Firstly

, Smartphones or computers make

children

less active.

This

is because

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

technologies can be addictive, a child are willing to spend hours playing video games rather than participating in extracurricular activities after school.

As a result

, the

children

become lazy to exercise and not be able to control their weight.

Secondly

, technology is one of the main reasons for autism in

children

. They tend not to

towant

Correct your spelling

want

communicate with other people and may feel safer when they live in their virtual world.

On the other hand

, I believe that with the support of technology, they will bring practical benefits to

children

Firstly

this

is a great tool for

children

to research and find more information and knowledge after school.

Secondly

, technologies help

children

make more friends from all over the world.

Finally

, smartphones or computers can help

children

learn foreign languages better which will help them increase job opportunities in the future. In ,conclusion I would argue that the appearance of new technological improvements brings more benefits than drawbacks.

Submitted by hugoductam on Tue Jun 06 2023

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for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

220 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

advantages
disadvantages
new technologies
children
free time
access
educational resources
information
development
key skills
enhancing
creativity
imagination
opportunity
connect
convenience
flexibility
lack
physical activity
potential
health issues
impact
social
emotional development
exposure
inappropriate content
addiction
dependency

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New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantage

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people think that painting and music do not directly improve the quality of people. Therefore, governments should not spend too much money on artistic projects. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that young people should go to university to further their education while others think they should be encouraged to work as car mechanics or builders etc.to serve society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

With the rise in popularity of the internet, newspapers will soon become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think foreign visitors should be charged more than local people when they visit the cultural and historical attractions in a country To what extent do you agree or disagree?