The graph below gives information about the number of Catholics residing in different nations.

The graph below gives information about the number of Catholics residing in different nations.
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The given graph illustrates data about the number of Catholics who dwelled in diverse territories, over a
three - year
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three-year
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period from 2010 to 2013.
Overall
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, it can be seen that a high majority of Catholics
prefered
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preferred
living in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
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while
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only a small crowd chose Japan as a living country over the period in question. Looking at the details, the
amount
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number
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of
this
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race's folks who lived in China was 9,000,000 and it increased to 15,000,000 people in 2013 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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similar swarms were witnessed in India. Followingly,
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
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was a popular zone for these expatriates in 2010 with 75,940,000 members which was the highest amount but in 2013,it experienced a decrease and reached 72,000,000
Additionally
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, Vietnam and Korea had
the
Correct article usage
apply
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similar numbers in 2010 but in 2013,5,321,168 members settled in Vietnam
while
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this
Linking Words
quantity fell to around 1,000,000 in
korea
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Korea
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. If we look at Japan, it was
the
Correct article usage
an
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unpopular area among
this
Linking Words
race's people because only 400,000 folks lived in it in 2010 and 509,000 members lived in 2013.
Submitted by mehrdad.salahi2003 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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