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Band 5.5

The graph below gives information about the number of Catholics residing in different nations.

The graph below gives information about the number of Catholics residing in different nations.
#information #catholics #nations
The given graph illustrates data about the number of Catholics who dwelled in diverse territories, over a
three - year
Correct your spelling
three-year
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 period from 2010 to 2013.
Overall
, it can be seen that a high majority of Catholics
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 living in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
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while
 only a small crowd chose Japan as a living country over the period in question. Looking at the details, the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
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 of
this
 race's folks who lived in China was 9,000,000 and it increased to 15,000,000 people in 2013 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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similar swarms were witnessed in India. Followingly,
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
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 was a popular zone for these expatriates in 2010 with 75,940,000 members which was the highest amount but in 2013,it experienced a decrease and reached 72,000,000
Additionally
, Vietnam and Korea had
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
similar numbers in 2010 but in 2013,5,321,168 members settled in Vietnam
while
this
 quantity fell to around 1,000,000 in
korea
Change the capitalization
Korea
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. If we look at Japan, it was
the
Correct article usage
an
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 unpopular area among
this
 race's people because only 400,000 folks lived in it in 2010 and 509,000 members lived in 2013.
Submitted by mehrdad.salahi2003 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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