Some people believe that humans should be able to use animals for their own benefit, while others argue that the rights of animals should be protected. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

A bunch of people think that nobody has the right to kill creatures
whereas
, others opine that they can use them for their own benefit. I go with the latter view which I discuss in forthcoming paragraphs. Well, everyone has a right to freedom so, it is obvious that they can move freely anywhere.
Therefore
, people don't need to interfere in their privacy because
god
gives life to all living beings. If anyone kills the
animals
he will go against the
god
and law of nature.
For example
, most holy books show that
god
gives different
power
Fix the agreement mistake
powers
show examples
strength
Fix the agreement mistake
strengths
show examples
and senses to feel and live on the earth
according to
this
, all are equal even if they are
animals
and humans so, they can live together in all situations.
However
, humans are the best creation of
god
, they have brains to think if he can do anything so, it's not wrong he can use
animals
to do his work .
Moreover
, some
species
are survived
Wrong verb form
survive
show examples
by killing and eating other
animals
,
then
Rephrase
so
show examples
man cannot do
this
thing in his life.
For instance
, on a planet every
species
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
dependent on other
species
to make a food chain
otherwise
,some
animals
become large in quantity
instead
of others.
As a result
,It
makes
Verb problem
causes
show examples
big disturbances in the food chain. In conclusion,
although
all
animals
have the right to live without any disturbance, it is important to make a balance in nature so,
if
Correct word choice
that if
show examples
people like to kill some
species
that's not wrong whether they eat or do work from them.
Submitted by grewalpt1249 on

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task response
Ensure that the essay fully addresses both views and provides a clear opinion. Develop the arguments in a more balanced and structured manner.
coherence and cohesion
Work on structuring the essay with clear paragraphs and logical progression of ideas. Use appropriate linking devices to improve coherence and cohesion.

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