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Band 6.5

The line graph given illustrates the number of people who travel to work by three separate means of transport in the UK from 1970 to 2030.

The line graph given illustrates the number of people who travel to work by three separate means of transport in the UK from 1970 to 2030.
#line #people #travel #work #three #transport #uk
The given line graph represents the total
oil
 used in four different areas, namely the US,
China
, Western
Europe
 &
Japan
 and
Middle
Correct article usage
the Middle
show examples
 East over a 22-year period, starting from 2009.
Overall
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
oil
consumption
 in the US, Western
Europe
 and
Japan
 witness a downward trend,
while
 the opposite is true for
China
 and the
Middle
 East.
Additionally
, US
oil
consumption
 is by far
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
widely-consumed
Correct your spelling
widely consumed
show examples
 over the period shown.
To begin
 with, the US
oil
consumption
 ranked highest with nearly 9
million
, followed by Western
Europe
 &
Japan
 with 4
million
 and
China
,
Middle
 East with exactly 2
million
 in the first examined year. Following that,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
that of Western
Europe
 &
Japan
 fall dramatically by 2
million
 in 2025.
Conversely
, the figure for the
Middle
 East and
China
 rise steadily from 2 to 2,5 and 4
million
, respectively.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 there is a fluctuation in the US area. Turning next to the total
consumption
 in the US is below 10
million
 over a 16-year period
then
 it is forecasted that it will go down
under
Change preposition
to under
show examples
 8
million
 in 2030. Having a similar trend, albeit less pronounced, the figure for
China
 and Western
Europe
 &
Japan
 witness a small drop of 0,5
million
.
In contrast
, the total
oil
consumption
 in
Middle
Correct article usage
the Middle
show examples
 East area
surpass
Correct subject-verb agreement
surpasses
show examples
 Western
Europe
 &
Japan
 at 2,5
million
then
 it
rise
Change the verb form
rises
show examples
 continuously to around 3
million
 during the same time frame.
Submitted by luudang97 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words oil, china, europe, japan, middle, consumption, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
▼
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