IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

There is certainly a difference in thoughts, ideas and actions between children their parents and grandparent. why do these exist? does it cause problem in yout community, in your opinion?

#difference #thoughts #actions #children #parents #grandparent #exist #yout #community
Each
generation
 creates new ways of living, making things easier, and children in
this
 21st century,
begin
Change the form of the verb
beginning
show examples
 with their career in technology as compared to their
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
 or grandparents,
thus
 it brings a change in their mindset. In the looming paragraphs, I will discuss why these difference arises between them and does it cause an issue for society. To commence with, a significant development has been observed every decade, the living standards of each
generation
 vary to the upcoming
generation
,
due to
 which a big gap in mindset has been observed among
parents
 and their
heir
Fix the agreement mistake
heirs
show examples
.
Moreover
,
parents
 or grandparents push their up-bringings to do hard work, become a bookworm to become successful , but the new
generation
 focuses on smart work because of the advances in technology everything is optimized and it is too difficult for the old
generation
 people to
adapt
Correct your spelling
adopt
show examples
 it as compared to their children.
However
, it is an undeniable fact that the difference in the conceptual levels between each
generation
 is a significant problem. Grandparents or
parents
 know how to give respect to their elders but their children did not understand the value of respect, and feelings.
Thus
, these issues can affect the upcoming society. In a nutshell, each aspect has its pros and cons.
Although
 advancement in lifestyle technology will definitely help each
generation
 to do something extraordinary,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
change in lifestyles, brings a huge difference between the new
generation
 and their
parents
. As a matter of fact, they did not value emotions and did not even respect each other.
Submitted by pranav10puri on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: