IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagram details the process of making wool. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram details the process of making wool. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The given diagram shows how to make
wool
Use synonyms
 for consumer products.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that there are fourteen steps, beginning with collecting the raw materials and the end with finished consumer products.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
wool
Use synonyms
 is obtained from sheep. The sheep is shared (cut the
wool
Use synonyms
 off). After that, the
wool
Use synonyms
 is cleaned and sent to the dryer to dry it.
Next,
Linking Words
the
wool
Use synonyms
transferred
Add a missing verb
was transferred
show examples
 into a machine to spin it. In
this
Linking Words
 process, it can transform into two different types which are string and
wool
Use synonyms
. For string, if it can't be used, it's going to the recycling process.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, people combined
wool
Use synonyms
 together into multiple tufts of
wool
Use synonyms
 and keep it inside the store. After that, there are made into balls, called balls of yarn. People used these yarns for knitting and producing various products
such
Linking Words
 as carpets and jackets.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words wool with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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