IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#money #businesses #responsibilities
It is argued that as with being profitable, enterprises are able to take responsibility for society. I completely agree with
this
 belief by
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 formidable positive impact on socioeconomic can be made. On the one hand, it is true that the main purpose of companies is to make money in order to survive in a competitive world. Facing unpaid bills, investment fees, employees’ salaries, etc leading to making money is the first choice.
However
, in fact, they are not only implementing the common function but
also
 responding to the responsibilities that can be included in earning money. If companies succeed in making a profit, it will facilitate new employees
a
Change preposition
in a
show examples
workspace to expand their abilities and deplete the proportion of unemployed people.
Due to
this
, it is the vital element supporting the economic growth of regions or nations which means raising the quality of citizens’ lives.
On the other hand
, companies should be aware that society’s obstacles are impacted by them.
For example
, the surroundings can be affected by sound, air, water pollutants and pollution, which highly damage
citizen’s
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens’
show examples
 health and accommodation.
According to
this
, the implementation of social obligation is to shed light on solutions to solve the issues
such
 as demolishing and reconstructing manufactures in urban areas,
additionally
, strictly carrying out tasks related to social responsibilities to avoid changing human lives. In conclusion, despite the main function of businesses
is
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 to make a profit, responsibilities are significant to solve the problems in order to lessen the negative impacts.
Submitted by canthaison on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social responsibilities
  • Corporate social responsibility
  • Ethical behavior
  • Societal impact
  • Stakeholders
  • Profit-driven
  • Public perception
  • Environmental sustainability
  • Community development
  • Human rights
  • Workplace safety
  • Altruism
  • Balanced approach
  • Accountability
  • Consumer loyalty
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