IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given table shows
comparison
Add an article
a comparison
the comparison
show examples
 of
police
Correct article usage
the police
show examples
 budget between 2017 and 2018
while
Linking Words
pie
Correct article usage
the pie
show examples
 chart gives information about
usage
Add an article
the usage
show examples
 of money
fund
Fix the agreement mistake
funds
show examples
 in
same
Add an article
the same
show examples
 period of time. At
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
first glance all sources of money, which they used, uplifted,
on the other hand
Linking Words
,
distribution
Correct article usage
the distribution
show examples
 of funding
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
declined slightly. It is crystal clear to see that the national government is
biggest
Change the article
the biggest
show examples
 source of
annual
Add an article
the annual
an annual
show examples
 budget
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 both years which accounted
175,5
Change preposition
for 175,5
show examples
 million
gbp
Correct your spelling
GBP
 in 2017, and
also
Linking Words
 it increased
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 3,3 million after one year. In the second place, local taxes' funding increased to 102,3 million which is
biggest
Change the article
the biggest
show examples
 improvement
all
Change preposition
for all
show examples
 of them.
Linking Words
Lastly
Add a comma
,Lastly
show examples
 other sources increased
38
Change preposition
from 38
show examples
 to 38,5 which is
Correct article usage
a slightly
show examples
slightly
Change the word
slight
show examples
 change.
About
Change preposition
To
show examples
pie
Correct article usage
the pie
show examples
 chart, there is a decrease
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
officers
Change noun form
officers'
officer's
show examples
salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
show examples
 which is 75
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 to 69
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
technological
Correct article usage
the technological
show examples
 proportion almost doubled in 2018.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, we can
also
Linking Words
 see that buildings and
transport's
Change noun form
transport
show examples
 funding
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 steady in
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 two years.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fiscal allocations
  • Revenue streams
  • Budgetary oversight
  • Expenditure
  • Financial appropriation
  • Government grants
  • Local taxation
  • Operational costs
  • Capital investment
  • Public safety
  • Crime prevention
  • Community policing
  • Resource allocation
  • Year-on-year comparison
  • Budgetary constraints
  • Fiscal year
  • Fund disbursement
  • Budget deficit/surplus
  • Trend analysis
  • Financial sustainability
  • Law enforcement funding
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