The line graph shows the consumption of 4 kinds of meats in a European country from 1979 to 2004.

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The line chart illustrates the numerous

Change preposition

apply

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foods

who

Correct pronoun usage

that

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are consumed over a period of 25 years starting from 1979 in Europe.

Overall

Linking Words

it is clear that

Linking Words

chicken consumption shows

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increase in 25 years,

whereas

Linking Words

fish, beef, and lamb have a downward trend.

Although

Linking Words

chicken provides a fluctuation between 1979 and 2004, it has become a

favorite

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favourite

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meals

Correct the article-noun agreement

meal

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Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

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European nations. The consumption of chicken started below 150

Use synonyms

gram

Fix the agreement mistake

grams

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in 1979 and it fluctuated until 2000, reached a peak at 250

Use synonyms

gram

Fix the agreement mistake

grams

show examples

and it fell

down

Change preposition

apply

show examples

again in 2004 to around 240

Use synonyms

gram

Fix the agreement mistake

grams

show examples

On the other hand

Linking Words

, beef and lamb meats

also

Linking Words

experienced a decrease even though they fluctuated

along

Change preposition

over

show examples

a quarter of

century

Add an article

a century

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. In 1979,

majority

Correct article usage

the majority

show examples

of European people consumed beef and lamb, respectively approximately 225

Use synonyms

gram

Fix the agreement mistake

grams

show examples

and 150

Use synonyms

gram

Fix the agreement mistake

grams

show examples

yet both of them drop significantly by

Remove the article

apply

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half, reaching above 100

Use synonyms

gram

Fix the agreement mistake

grams

show examples

and 50

Use synonyms

gram

Fix the agreement mistake

grams

show examples

in 2004.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, fish consumption

also

Linking Words

revealed a decline but it has a steady downward over the periods from 55

Use synonyms

gram

Fix the agreement mistake

grams

show examples

in 1979 to almost 50

Use synonyms

gram

Fix the agreement mistake

grams

show examples

in 2004.

dimasfajarairlanggaMon Jun 12 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words gram with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "downward" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 2 times.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

178 words

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The line graph shows the consumption of 4 kinds of meats in a European country from 1979 to 2004.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this case ? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development ?

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or negative development?

It is generally accepted that exercise is good for children and teenager. Therefore , Physical education and sport should be compulsory for all the students in all school. What do you think?

some people belive that unpaid community service should be a compulsary part of high school programmes. to what extent do you agree or disagree