16.When a new town is planned, it is more important to develop public parks and sports facilities than shopping centres for people to spend their free time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Well,
Health
Use synonyms
is wealth and it is every individual's responsibility to take care of it. Notion states that fitness centres and public parks should be given priority
while
Linking Words
establishing a new town rather than shopping malls. I
also
Linking Words
agree with that and will describe it in upcoming paragraphs. First and foremost, in
this
Linking Words
contemporary era, it is very important to maintain
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
fitness because everybody is using new advanced technology that makes their life sedentary and they are doing everything
while
Linking Words
sitting or not doing much.
Thus
Linking Words
, it
Change the verb form
results
show examples
result
Add the preposition
inresult
fromresult
show examples
many
health
Use synonyms
issues that need to be fixed. So, if the town would have playgrounds or some sports centres
then
Linking Words
people will definitely use them.
For instance
Linking Words
, a survey was conducted in 2023 and it revealed that those societies
arehealthier
Correct your spelling
are healthier
in
which
Correct word choice
that
show examples
they have some fitness clubs
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
they are spending their time doing various outdoor activities.
Moreover
Linking Words
, spending time
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
doing physical activities can
also
Linking Words
work well in managing an individual's mental strength. In
this
Linking Words
hectic schedule, every single person has some kind of stress in their mind.
Therfore
Correct your spelling
Therefore
it is very vital for them to do physical work like walking, running, and playing badminton with their families etcetera because it reduces their stress level by diverting their minds.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is more important to focus on developing governmental parks than shopping centres because
health
Use synonyms
is more important than everything and in
this
Linking Words
advanced global village, the government should need to encourage their nation to maintain their
health
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
playing.
Submitted by ekjotkaur882 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • urban planning
  • recreational areas
  • green spaces
  • cityscape
  • well-being
  • pedestrian-friendly
  • ecosystem
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • consumer culture
  • retail therapy
  • land use
  • zoning regulations
  • ecological footprint
  • sustainable development
  • infrastructure
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