16.When a new town is planned, it is more important to develop public parks and sports facilities than shopping centres for people to spend their free time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#town #parks #sports #facilities #centres #people #time

Well,

Health

is wealth and it is every individual's responsibility to take care of it. Notion states that fitness centres and public parks should be given priority

while

establishing a new town rather than shopping malls. I

also

agree with that and will describe it in upcoming paragraphs. First and foremost, in

this

contemporary era, it is very important to maintain

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

fitness because everybody is using new advanced technology that makes their life sedentary and they are doing everything

while

sitting or not doing much.

Thus

, it

Change the verb form

results

show examples

result

Add the preposition

inresult

fromresult

show examples

many

health

issues that need to be fixed. So, if the town would have playgrounds or some sports centres

then

people will definitely use them.

For instance

, a survey was conducted in 2023 and it revealed that those societies

arehealthier

Correct your spelling

are healthier

which

Correct word choice

that

show examples

they have some fitness clubs

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

they are spending their time doing various outdoor activities.

Moreover

, spending time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

doing physical activities can

also

work well in managing an individual's mental strength. In

this

hectic schedule, every single person has some kind of stress in their mind.

Therfore

Correct your spelling

Therefore

it is very vital for them to do physical work like walking, running, and playing badminton with their families etcetera because it reduces their stress level by diverting their minds.

Overall

, it is more important to focus on developing governmental parks than shopping centres because

health

is more important than everything and in

this

advanced global village, the government should need to encourage their nation to maintain their

health

while

playing.

Submitted by ekjotkaur882 on Tue Jun 13 2023

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

250 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

urban planning
recreational areas
green spaces
cityscape
well-being
pedestrian-friendly
ecosystem
sedentary lifestyle
consumer culture
retail therapy
land use
zoning regulations
ecological footprint
sustainable development
infrastructure

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16.When a new town is planned, it is more important to develop public parks and sports facilities than shopping centres for people to spend their free time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while other think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Dicss both view and give our opinion

The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Shopping is becoming more and more popular as a leisure activity. However, some people feel that this has both positive and negative effects. Why is shopping so popular? What effects does its increase in popularity have on individuals and on society?

In many parts of the world girls and boys are educated together in co-educational or mixed schools. Some people think that girls and boys benefit from being educated separately in single-sex schools. To what extent do you agree with this view?