The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In the modern day, it can be seen clearly that a lot of inventions in
science
and technology are created to promote the living standard of humans
. I completely agree with the statement and I think people
can benefit from science
to become more healthy and convenient in life
.
The first reason, science
in medicine , can create more modern technology to improve diagnosis quickly and exactly or treatment as well. By focusing on benefits for humans
, science
has played an important role in eradicating diseases, extending life
expectancy, and decreasing suffering. For example
, in covid 19 disease, thanks to the development of vaccines, the number of deaths went down dramatically. Thus
, science
's primary aim to improve people
's lives is evident in its impact on health and medicine.
The second reason, science
helps the lives of people
in various aspects. When electricity was created for digital renovation, science
significantly enhanced communication, and transportation which helps things become much more convenient for humans
. It not only increased performance at work but also
provided people
with the opportunity to connect new education,
and entertainment. Remove the comma
apply
For instance
, the smartphone can help people
in many activities such
as communicating with other people
from so
far away , looking for information or a book that makes you spend a lot of time in the library quickly.
In conclusion, in my point of view, I think that the aim of Rephrase
apply
science
should be focusing
on improving human Wrong verb form
to focus
life
. Because science
has been created to serve humans
and make people
have a better life
Submitted by jakedth162 on
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task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your main points are clearly supported and developed throughout the essay.
lexical resource
Consider using a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your essay.
grammatical range accuracy
Review the use of grammar and sentence structures for better fluency and accuracy.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite