Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

There is no doubt that these days
children
spend many
hours
every day on their phones. The question is, is
this
case a positive or negative development? In terms of disadvantages, there are lots of
kids
who have different diseases. The main reason provided to support
this
claim is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
when they spend plenty of
hours
in front of their smartphones,
that
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
will get many diseases,
such
as obesity. To illustrate, movement is vital for
kids
, so it is wrong if they do not play and do some activities.
Also
, it is important for
children
to have friends and good relationships with their families.
Therefore
, they need to make friends in their neighbourhoods and play together.
Additionally
, the
children
have to talk with their siblings and parents, and not spend all their time on phones only.
Moreover
, education is very critical presently.
Therefore
, the
children
have to focus on their studies. To elaborate, the
kids
should do their homework and study more if they have exams.
This
is because it is vital to make a balance for everything in your life.
However
, there are some things you should do it first.
Furthermore
,
usually
Add a comma
,usually
show examples
the
children
have a lot of talents, and they are interested to find new things.
For instance
, always the
children
broke their toys to know how it works.
On the contrary
, when the
kids
spend many
hours
on their smartphones they will not try to find new things.
Also
, that makes the
children
stupid. In conclusion, technology is dangerous for
kids
, especially those who spend
hours
on their devices.
Thus
, parents need to make limited time for their
children
.
Submitted by abdulilahali2023 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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