IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The higher proportion of older population will over take younger generation what is the reason? is it positive or negative development?

#proportion #population #generation #reason #development
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generation
Use synonyms
 of young
people
Use synonyms
 will not be change all of the
number
Use synonyms
elder
Change to a plural noun
elders
show examples
 with the most percentage. it is because the ranges youngest and elder
is
Change the verb form
are
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 different and depend on the numerous
people
Use synonyms
 in the country. it is a positive side to
develop
Wrong verb form
developing
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youngest
Correct article usage
the youngest
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 can help elder
people
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 and can be
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generation
Add an article
a generation
the generation
show examples
 in the future. the sum
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
 between younger and older is different. Based on data, human marriage can
reproduct
Correct your spelling
reproduce
 more than one child, in the past the
parents
Use synonyms
 usually have a child more than 10 children. if we calculate the sum
up
Change preposition
of
show examples
parents
Use synonyms
 and
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
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, it means the
number
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 of younger more than the
number
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 of
parents
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. it proof will not change if the percentage elder the most than younger.
for example
Linking Words
, based on culture, in the past
parents
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 knew if they have many children they got
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
grateful.
in
Change preposition
On
show examples
positive
Add an article
the positive
show examples
 side, the younger
will
Correct pronoun usage
ones will
show examples
 be able
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 elder to
got
Wrong verb form
get
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 what they do
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 if the children have a good personality and they do not think about the problem they have it. in
conclution
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, the huge youngest is not
depend
Replace the word
dependent
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 on the
number
Use synonyms
elder
Change preposition
of elder
show examples
 in the same city but
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
 positive side the youngest will be able present
generation
Use synonyms
 from the elder
generation
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by sakinah.snr on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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