Small businesses are disappearing and being replaced by large multinational companies. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#businesses #companies #outweigh

Recently,

development

Correct article usage

the development

show examples

of large multinational

companies

significantly increased in some developed countries and developing countries.

This

circumstance can influence the

development

of small traders.

For

this

reason,

this

essay will discuss why the benefits of the

development

of large multinational

companies

outweigh the drawback. The existence of multinational corporations can provide many job vacancies

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because operating large

companies

needs

Change the verb form

need

show examples

more human resources to do it.

Hence

, the trend of multinational

companies

in a country will significantly decrease unemployment.

For instance

currently

Add a comma

,currently

show examples

the government of Indonesia is seeking investment from large

companies

in the world to invest in Indonesia, in order to decrease

unemployment

Correct article usage

the unemployment

show examples

rate which causes

Correct article usage

the

show examples

impact of

pandemic

Add an article

a pandemic

the pandemic

show examples

On the other hand

, the significance of the

development

of multinational

companies

will influence the increased income of a country that receives tax

payment

Fix the agreement mistake

payments

show examples

from multinational

companies

For example

, the largest income of Indonesian countries is 80% from tax multinational

companies

However

this

circumstance will impact small

businesses

. Many people want to work in large

companies

to earn a large salary.

Therefore

, many small

businesses

will have difficulty in finding employees. Why the large

companies

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

becoming the trend of employees to work there,

due to

the large

companies

giving the employees some facilities

such

as insurance, incentive, birth allowance etc.

Whereas

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

small

businesses

operated by a traditional system

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

are not as professional as systems like large

companies

For example

, many small

businesses

in Indonesia like traditional markets will collapse. In conclusion, the benefit of

development

Add an article

the development

show examples

of multinational

companies

the

Correct article usage

show examples

decrease

Change preposition

show examples

unemployment

Add an article

the unemployment

show examples

rate and

increase

Correct article usage

an increase

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

government income.

However

this

circumstance will cause the bankruptcy of small

businesses

Submitted by maqbul.mohammad.m on Wed Jun 14 2023

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

272 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Displacement
Economies of scale
Local economies
Standardization
Cultural homogenization
Personalized service
Innovation
Community investments
Environmental impact
Competitive prices
Tax contributions
Job losses
Cultural diversity
Local employment opportunities

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Small businesses are disappearing and being replaced by large multinational companies. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development ?

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.

Some people say that in the modern world, getting old is entirely bad. Others, however, say that life for the elderly nowadays is much better than it was in the past. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people from poor and rural backgrounds find it difficult to get a university education. Universities should make it easier for such groups to enroll. To what extent do you agree or disagree?