IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outwiegh the disadvantages?

#experts #children #language #school #outwiegh
Nowadays, learning different languages is very beneficial and helpful.
According to
 experts children should start learning foreign languages in primary
school
 rather than secondary
school
. We shall discuss both the advantages and disadvantages in the upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
 with, primary
school
 is where children start to learn and adapt
Change preposition
to real
show examples
real world
Add a hyphen
real-world
show examples
 knowledge. They grab things easily as their cognitive and
itellectual
Correct your spelling
intellectual
 skills are developing. It will become
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
part of life which will be helpful for them in future. In
this
multi-linguil
Correct your spelling
multi-lingual
 world
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 we hear people talking in different languages. So, when children will
grew
Change the verb form
grow
show examples
 up they can make new friends easily. Every cloud has
silver
Add an article
a silver
show examples
 lining, so there are
also
 some disadvantages. Teaching kids
foreign
Correct article usage
a foreign
show examples
 language can add one more extra subject to their syllabus and there will be
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of pressure on them. In secondary
school
 they have
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 to focus on so, they might not be able to
consentrate
Correct your spelling
concentrate
 on all the different subjects at
same
Add an article
the same
show examples
 time. It will be
over- whelming
Correct your spelling
over-whelming
show examples
 for them,
also
 they can get stressed and
this
 in
return
Replace the word
turn
show examples
 will affect their
over all
Correct your spelling
overall
show examples
 grades.
To conclude
, considering both pros and cons,
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 outweigh the disadvantages
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
 kids lean fast.
Also
, with the help of modern technology
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 can teach them in interesting
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
 through stories or small
vedio
Correct your spelling
video
 clips.
Furthermore
,
primary
Add an article
the primary
show examples
school
 can have language
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
 twice a week to not
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
put
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of pressure on them.
Submitted by kaurubaman07 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: