IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many mesuems charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

#mesuems #charge #admission #people #museums
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Since the industrialization period,
which
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 we can characterize a fabric
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 when you particularly know what you will do and what kind of profession you should choose, the time is gone. Now we become
frier
Correct your spelling
freer
show examples
 and more creative in
choice
Correct pronoun usage
our choice
show examples
 of future profession, than the
last
Linking Words
 and we are exposed
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the risks of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
instability
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the same time. There are two opinions
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
Linking Words
 view. The first belief
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
 your chosen work should be standard and bring you money, whatever it will be like or unlike
Use synonyms
job
Correct pronoun usage
your job
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 point of view the old generation agitates usually. I think it happens because the of stability which they adapted.
Also
Linking Words
, the usual habit is ‘’to give my son or daughter my deal and work’’ which as
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 result a person lost
this
Linking Words
 possibility in the choice of profession. The second belief
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
 you should hear your heart and do what you want and don’t pay attention to the command from the society or the parents.
This
Linking Words
 view belongs
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 young generation usually. And as we know, the internet consists of a lot of career tests,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
inspirations
Replace the word
inspirational
show examples
 stories from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
bloggers,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
designers,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
managers,
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the people who open their businesses because they wanted
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 way doesn’t promise that you stand the life’s difficult situation and stay without a
job
Use synonyms
. Many of our familiars can’t find any
job
Use synonyms
, because they don’t know what they like. In conclusion, my opinion is the middle should be between these two beliefs. In
ideal
Add an article
the ideal
show examples
 picture, the
job
Use synonyms
 can be paid and exciting, and everyone tries to reach it. Contrary, we should remember that the financial independent stands in the first place in our realization of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modernity.
Submitted by dulskywork on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: