IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Write about the following topic: Should long-term job seekers in receipt of government benefits be made to do voluntary work so that they give something back to the community? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#topic #job #seekers #receipt #government #work #community
People
 tend to do a lot of jobs for free for the benefit of others
due to
 their sense of humanity. Are these concerns only workers in receipt of government who are looking for a long-term position? Are they forced to volunteer in return for the work position?
First,
All communities should participate to do charity jobs.
People
 need
people
. We must walk hand in hand in
order
 to survive
this
 crucial life. If everyone is selfish and cares only for the
people
 he loves, who is concerned by other humans?
Besides
, life is give and take. You have to give in
order
 to receive. Do not expect others to help you if you do not lift a finger to do the same for them.
However
, the government must make strict laws about
this
 matter.
Such
 as In
order
 to get a full-time job you need to sign a contract with a charity association of your choice. If not other methods should be replaced.
For example
, cutting off a percentage from your wages in
order
 to help those associations.
Also
, rich society is the first to be obliged to help others
as well as
 pay high amounts of taxes to the community in
order
 to provide more work positions for job seekers.
To conclude
, as far as I am concerned with
this
 beneficial effort I will be happy to do voluntary work especially if the government provides me with an appropriate post. I will be thrilled if I can help the population to be educated as far as I am a teacher.
Submitted by faten92.fd on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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