New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

#technologies #children #time #trend

It is clear that

new technologies influence the way

children

spend their free

time

Although

there is a great number of disadvantages, I believe that the benefits can play an important role in

children’s’

Correct your spelling

children’s

lives. Nowadays, because of using new technologies

children

have gotten smarter, and they can focus on any subjects they are interested in. They put effort into that particular subject and

end

Wrong verb form

ended

show examples

up being successful in doing all kinds of projects. Studies show that

children

who play video games in their free

time

can come up with creative solutions

easier

Rephrase

more easily

show examples

than other

children

Furthermore

, they are better decision-makers in case of emergency.

For example

, when their siblings or even themselves face a problem, they start thinking faster than it is expected. Some of them

also

do better at school subjects because of being able to concentrate. They are

also

better multi-taskers than other

kids

of the same age.

On the other hand

, a lot of

parents

are worried about their

kids

’ playing or using technology

time

. They believe that working with cell phones or computers for long hours can cause mental problems in the future.

For example

, they have mentioned anxiety as one of the disorders their

kids

may face in the near future.

Moreover

, having a long screen

time

will prevent them from studying and the

parents

are not sure if their

kids

are going to finish school with acceptable grades or not. In conclusion,

although

some

parents

are over strict and don’t let their

children

use new technologies, the

time

their

kids

spend using technology is an important and controllable factor. If the

kids

don’t go overboard, there won’t be any problems. And of course,

parents

can use it as an efficient tool for

children

’s upbringing. They can teach them to take advantage of technology in order to make their dreams come true.

Submitted by TUTOO on Sun Jun 18 2023

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

308 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The use of social media, e.g. Facebook and Twitter, is replacing face-to-face contact for many people in everyday life. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work . some people regard this as completely wrong , while others consider it valuable work experience , important for learning and taking responsibility . What are your opinion on this ?

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (for example working on charity, teaching sport to younger people) To what extent do you agree or disagree?