Art classes, such as painting and drawing are as important for children's development as other subjects so it should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree.

I disagree with the above statement that
art
classes
,
such
as painting and drawing are as essential for a kid's development as other
subjects
therefore
, they should not be compulsory in high school.
Firstly
, children are already occupied with so many
subjects
, by incorporating painting and drawing and making it a must
will
Remove a modal verb
apply
show examples
put a
burden
on them, they might not perform well
due to
too many
subjects
that they need to focus on.
Art
classes
should be treated as an option rather than making it compulsory.
Secondly
, not every child is interested in
craft
Fix the agreement mistake
crafts
show examples
, for, example painting and drawing, when children don't have an interest
then
they won't perform well, they will be just doing it for the sake of doing things.
Therefore
, it's better suited for extra-circular activities.
Thirdly
, it can be costly the materials used and needed for painting and drawing can cost parents quite a lot, and the money spent on these materials can be spent
elsewhere
, looking at the cost of living which is on the rise.
Lastly
, there will be a
burden
on the teachers as they will have to deal with many
subjects
, which will lead to stress and added workload on them, they might want to switch to some other jobs or
quite
Correct your spelling
quit
show examples
due to
pressure, as a
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
result students will suffer as there will be no teachers for them to teach. In conclusion, I disagree with the above statement because it loads an extra
burden
on students, and children may not be interested in taking
art
classes
.
Art
classes
can be costly for parents to pay for. There will be a
burden
on teachers as they will be dealing with many
subjects
.
Submitted by A on

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    • Sentence 2 - Example
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cognitive development
  • Visual-spatial skills
  • Fine motor skills
  • Emotional expression
  • Creative thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Cultural awareness
  • Historical context
  • Interpersonal skills
  • Teamwork
  • Collaboration
  • Self-esteem
  • Sense of accomplishment
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