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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many young people are leaving their homes in rural areas to study or work in the cities. What are the reasons? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #homes #areas #study #work #cities
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Many adolescents leave the rural area where they live in order to study or work in the
cities
 . the forthcoming essay will examine the benefits and do they outweigh the drawbacks
along with
 discussing the reasons .
To begin
 with, there are several factors why youngsters move on to the
cities
 .
Firstly
 ,
it is clear that
 rural
areas
such
 as towns , and countrysides have limited opportunities . The vast majority of villages do not have high institution facilities or availability of technology .
For example
 nowadays , in the high-tech ,era many students need internet or a degree that will be appropriate for the future ,
while
 the internet connection level in rural
areas
 is poor and universities if they at least exist provide mostly in the agriculture field .
Additionally
 ,
cities
 are the best place to start a career because of the high profit and amount of jobs
along with
 the big companies ,
whereas
 towns that have jobs like
this
,
Remove the comma
apply
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are not
such
 profitable because of the area .
On the other hand
 , by going to the
cities
 ,
areas
 they abandon get worse . If they had stayed ,
a
Correct article usage
the
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 number of young people would have increased
together with
 requirements to keep them on the same level as city ones . If they stayed , they might add new routes to study and work to do. Leaving juveniles
reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
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 the level of improvement in countryside
areas
 and create a bigger gap between
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
areas
 . In conclusion, the reasons for abandoning
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rural place by young people are the advantages
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
cities
 that outweigh the disadvantages .
Submitted by sekasamsung228 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-urban migration
  • quest
  • higher education institutions
  • job markets
  • allure
  • healthcare
  • technological and infrastructural advancements
  • personal and professional growth
  • brain drain
  • cultural shift
  • traditional values
  • dilution of cultural identity
  • overcrowding
  • pollution
  • high cost of living
What to do next:
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