“Some people believe that exercise is the key to good health while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important
While
it is believed by some people
that exercise is an essential part of a healthy life, others think that having a balance food intake is the key. In my opinion, both exercise and balanced
Add an article
a balanced
diet
are needed for a
healthy living, as their effects are synergistic.
On the one hand, some Correct article usage
apply
people
think that exercising is the key to health as it helps to reduce the risk of overweight
.Add a missing verb
being overweight
Also
, workout
keeps a person's mind refreshed. Correct article usage
a workout
For instance
, any physical work like running in fresh air tends to breathe in more oxygen which is very effective in relieving mental pressure. In addition
, unlike heavy gymnasium equipments
, yoga is a classic example Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
which
an individual of every age group can practice and benefit from it. Correct word choice
that
Thus
, physical
workout is considered a key to Add an article
the physical
a physical
healthy
life and Add an article
a healthy
balanced
mind.
Correct article usage
a balanced
On the other hand
, others consider that having a balanced diet
is also
a key role to reinforce people
's bodies. Firstly
, consuming numerous healthy nutrition
, Replace the word
nutrients
such
as vitamin
C and D, can help Fix the agreement mistake
vitamins
people
to build up a more robust immune system, such
practice has contained several medical scientific evidence. For example
, having green vegetables or fruits may provide a spectrum of ingredients and nutrition for people
to construct a more
fit body. Correct quantifier usage
apply
Secondly
, having a balanced diet
may also
descend people
's risks
Fix the agreement mistake
risk
for
having deadly diseases, expanding one's range of life.
Change preposition
of
To sum up
, both useful exercises and diet
are vitally important for people
's lives, also
, there are many preferable sides in
them.Change preposition
to
Submitted by ieltsteaching0 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?