IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Finding job satisfaction is considered to be a luxury in many developing countries. What do you think that is? Do you think job satisfaction is important?

#job #satisfaction #luxury #countries
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Today,
people
Use synonyms
 face many troubles that are finding a
job
Use synonyms
 in their lives.
Due to
Linking Words
 the ever-increasing number of universities in the countries,
people
Use synonyms
 cannot get a proper
job
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 related to their expertise. Many developing countries regard
work
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
 as a luxury. In my opinion, finding a good
job
Use synonyms
 becomes harder because there are many
people
Use synonyms
 who graduate from universities.
Although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 trouble, why
job
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
 is significant is that
people
Use synonyms
 want to lead a comfortable
life
Use synonyms
 in many aspects and they want to have healthy ties with their
colleagues
Use synonyms
. The main reason why
job
Use synonyms
 fulfilment is important is that
people
Use synonyms
 want to lead a comfortable
life
Use synonyms
 in many aspects that are better income.
That is
Linking Words
 to say, if
people
Use synonyms
 earn enough salaries from their jobs, they can easily afford what they want. Many researchers assert that
people
Use synonyms
 who earn minimum wage have difficulty meeting their basic needs.
For
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 reason, high salaries enable to
people
Use synonyms
 live better
life
Use synonyms
 standards.
Moreover
Linking Words
, when
people
Use synonyms
 are pleased with their own jobs, they can
work
Use synonyms
 harder and
this
Linking Words
 situation would lead to earning enough salaries.
However
Linking Words
, because of competition among
people
Use synonyms
, they cannot easily a proper
job
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 related to their expertise.
For instance
Linking Words
, the number of teachers is increasing dramatically every passing day and they cannot easily a
job
Use synonyms
 in schools. As a matter
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 fact, drags many teachers into unemployment and unhappiness. Another equally significant reason why
work
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
 is important is that
people
Use synonyms
 want to have a healthy relationship with their
colleagues
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 spend their most of time in the workplace. In the light of
this
Linking Words
 reality, they want to
work
Use synonyms
 in a harmonious environment. If they do not get on well with
colleagues
Use synonyms
, their working performance can decrease day by day and they do not want to go their
work
Use synonyms
. Unfortunately, there are many unqualified
people
Use synonyms
 who have almost no experience in their field and
this
Linking Words
 situation can be an obstacle to becoming a team with qualified
people
Use synonyms
 who are in their field.
To sum up
Linking Words
, finding
job
Use synonyms
 achievement is regarded as a luxury but it is possible to associate
job
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Use synonyms
 with a variety of positive effects, two of which are higher
Use synonyms
life
Replace the word
living
show examples
 standards and better relationships with
colleagues
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by sevdetekin17 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: