Nowadays , People have adopted an unhealthy lifestyle. Why do think this is ? How could this problem be solved ?

Lifestyle is becoming one of the most important things in our
life
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lives
show examples
that determine what kind of person we are in the future. In
this
modern day, everyone has a choice about their own
life
. Some
people
agree to have
a
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apply
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healthy habits, they choose to eat food with
balance
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balanced
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nutritions
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nutrition
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, exercise more, and enough sleep.
On the other hand
, others tend to take a bad way of
life
such
as
eat
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eating
show examples
junk food, less sleep, and less workout.
This
choice could lead someone into a bad condition, physically and mentally.
This
essay will explain the causes and how to address those issues.
To begin
with, today everybody competes with others to be the fastest, the smartest,
the
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and the
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greatest so
people
can create
a
Correct article usage
the
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life
that they have dreamed of. Many
people
struggle
everyday
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every day
show examples
to be the winner at the
shool
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school
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or the office.
Unconciously
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Unconsciously
, it
brings
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causes
show examples
them to choose an instant
acitivity
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activity
.
For example
, in the past
people
used to cook
in
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at
show examples
their home and brought it to the workplace,
instead
of
order
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ordering
show examples
online for their
lunch time
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lunchtime
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because it
is
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was
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faster and
need
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needed
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little effort. There are none of the
solution
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solutions
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about
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to
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this
issue except
raise
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to raise
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awareness for
ourself
Correct pronoun usage
ourselves
show examples
to be more responsible for our bodies. We need to wake up early so we can prepare our meals.
Futhermore
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Furthermore
, technology has become
the
Correct article usage
a
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major part of
this
problem. Despite the fact technology has many benefits, it makes us
doing
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do
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unproductive activities
such
as watching
instagram
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Instagram
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reels or
story
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stories
show examples
, watching
youtube
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YouTube
show examples
or playing video games. We don't realize scrolling
instagram
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Instagram
show examples
or playing video games
take
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takes
show examples
hours and
keep
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keeps
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us awake until night even
we
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though we
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already
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are already
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on
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in
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our
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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bed. Again, we need to control
ourself
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ourselves
show examples
to be
discipline
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disciplined
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
using gadgets. We need to schedule and be strict with
time-consuming
Correct article usage
the time-consuming
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for using it.
To sum up
, we have to be responsible and wise with our
choice
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choices
show examples
. If we already
took
Verb problem
have
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a bad lifestyle, the solution
always
Add a missing verb
is always
show examples
in
ourself
Correct pronoun usage
ourselves
show examples
and
obody
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nobody
body
can't do it for us.
Submitted by claudia.anggreacia on

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coherence cohesion
The logical structure is clear and organized, but there are some issues with introduction and conclusion.
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The essay provides a complete response but lacks clear and comprehensive ideas, as well as relevant specific examples.

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