Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some individuals think that attending higher
education
is the better way to achieve
success
in professional life,
whereas
others think that it is best to start work immediately after school.
In
Change preposition
From
show examples
my perspective, joining to
university
is the best method to accomplish
success
in
career
Correct article usage
the career
show examples
path. On the one hand, some hold the idea that
start
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
work straight after high school is
better
Add an article
a better
the better
show examples
way to have
successful
Add an article
a successful
show examples
career
.
This
is because there are many famous
businessessmen
Correct your spelling
businessmen
who become successful without
compelet
Correct your spelling
complete
their tertiary
education
.
For example
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Steve Jobs founded the biggest successful company worldwide called Apple,
although
his do not
attended
Change the verb form
attend
show examples
his
university
education
, which
this
successful story inspire many people to follow the same path.
On the other hand
, I agree with those people who believe that higher
education
is the best route to get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
success
in
professional
Add an article
the professional
show examples
path. To being with,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
univeristy
Correct your spelling
university
education
prepare
Change the verb form
prepares
show examples
students to become specialists in deep fields, which
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can increase
a
Change the word
their
show examples
chance to get better jobs.
For instance
, employees who study medicine or engineering or law are more likely to have high salaries and get better promotions opportunity, which
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
them satisfied
about
Change preposition
with
show examples
their jobs.
Furthermore
, studying
university
Change preposition
at university
show examples
can contribute positively to society.
For instance
, the researchers who discovered
vaccine
Fix the agreement mistake
vaccines
show examples
for Covid-19 are have tertiary
eudcation
Correct your spelling
education
, which
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
indicates
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
university
education
is
better
Add an article
a better
the better
show examples
way to
success
Replace the word
succeed
show examples
in future
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
.
To sum up
, In my opinion, the attend
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
higher
education
is the best method to achieve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
success
professional
Change preposition
in professional
show examples
life, because people who have
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
degree are more likely to have better future
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
namely, high salaries ,
developments
Correct word choice
and developments
show examples
opportunity than
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
do not attend
university
.
Submitted by faiz3177 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Academic qualifications
  • Specialized skills
  • In-depth knowledge
  • Personal growth
  • Social development
  • Practical experience
  • Financial independence
  • Career progression
  • Professional networking
  • Education
  • Work experience
  • Successful career
  • Personal interests
  • Career goals
  • Decision-making process
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