Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case ? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development ? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Using cellular
phones
hours a day
amongst
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among
show examples
some
children
has either advantages or disadvantages. I do agree that it contributes to drawbacks
instead
of benefits.
Due to
the technology
era
Add a comma
,era
show examples
it is inevitable that
children
tend to use their mobile
phones
a lot more than in the past. Allocating time usage in order to limit the drawbacks of the radiation
into
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in
show examples
their eyes could be a wise way without confiscating
children
’s rights.
On the other hand
, the reason why
children
seem to use their
cellphones
Correct your spelling
cell phones
show examples
much more is because of the necessity to
fulfill
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fulfil
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their responsibility as a student,
for
example
Add the comma(s)
,example
show examples
to be literate to support their sources regarding their homework. Interestingly, the trustworthy sources in the search engine are from journals, scientific research, etc which mostly are not using their own mother tongue. It may contribute students to
master
Wrong verb form
mastering
show examples
their English skills. Apart from that, using smartphones shows the tendency for
children
to lack less focus in terms of studying because
in
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,in
show examples
the meantime of studying, they use their cellphones not only for educational purposes but
also
for pampering themself,
for
instance
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,instance
show examples
surfing on social media or other platforms.
This
things
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thing
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happens, because of the addictive effect
from
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of
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mobile
phones
which are supported with tons of applications on
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. As it so, students might be less sociable with
surroundings
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their surroundings
show examples
either with classmates or with teachers,
other
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and other
show examples
parties in the school.
In addition
, the effectiveness of using smartphones regarding their study intention may lead to missed interpretation. All in all, I do believe that using mobile
phones
on a regular basis
amongst
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among
show examples
children
appears to show their drawbacks more
instead
of the benefit.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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