IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that the government should decide which subjects should students study at the University while other believe that students should be allowed to apply for subjects they prefer. Discuss both views.

#people #government #subjects #students #study #university
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The majority of society opines that the government ought to decide what
subjects
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
 should take at the University,
while
Linking Words
 others reckon that learners should be admitted to enrol for
subjects
Use synonyms
 that they aim for.
This
Linking Words
 essay will elaborate on both aforementioned perspectives in subsequent paragraphs. On the one hand,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 plays a pivotal role in leading
students
Use synonyms
 to choose their courses since there are several prophesied advantages. First and foremost, choosing
students
Use synonyms
' majors can help the country
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
reduce the unemployment crisis and unbalanced worker demand.
For instance
Linking Words
, many
students
Use synonyms
 opt to account as their study destination;
otherwise
Linking Words
, a couple of years ahead, accountants are rare in the job market
due to
Linking Words
 the invention of cutting-edge accounting machines.
Hence
Linking Words
, it will
arise
Correct your spelling
raise
show examples
 the joblessness rate.
Not to mention
Linking Words
 that some essential sectors are short of expertise
such
Linking Words
 as agriculture and renewable energy.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, choosing a subject by itself yields many positive impacts for
students
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, they are the one and only people who know what courses are suitable for them.
As a result
Linking Words
, they can
responsible
Add a missing verb
be responsible
show examples
 for their choices. Irrespective of that, learners feel more satisfied if they
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 to select their own desire.
Consequently
Linking Words
, they will be more motivated
in studying
Change preposition
to study
show examples
.
Conversely
Linking Words
, going to college with
subjects
Use synonyms
 that they do not like leads to an inefficient learning process.
To sum up
Linking Words
, pupils can be permitted to opt for the
subjects
Use synonyms
 they prefer in order to boost their motivation and satisfaction in university life.
However
Linking Words
, in balancing expertise and job demand in the country, the government ought to decide which courses should a student
learn
Verb problem
take
show examples
 at college.
Submitted by ieltscuns2022 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that your essay clearly addresses all parts of the essay prompt. Develop your ideas more fully and use specific examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the organization of your essay by clearly structuring your paragraphs and linking your ideas more cohesively.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: