Successful sports professionals earn a great deal more than people in other important professions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#sports #professionals #people #professions

It is considered that

sportmen

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

get handsome money rather than folks who work in

another essential areas

Replace the adjective

another essential area

other essential areas

show examples

medical

Correct article usage

the medical

show examples

and education

field

Fix the agreement mistake

fields

show examples

. In

this

essay, I will be implementing the grounds of both notions and

provide

Wrong verb form

providing

show examples

my prospect. To commence with, there

Add a missing verb

are a

show examples

plethora of reasons

Change preposition

apply

show examples

why

sportmen

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

earning

Wrong verb form

earn

show examples

more.

Initially

, a myriad of people possess

this

talent and they play for only

certain

Correct article usage

a certain

show examples

period of

time

. To elaborate

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

Change preposition

on it

show examples

, the

sportmen

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

only can play for

their

Change the word

show examples

certain age of

time

and after

that

Add a comma

,that

show examples

they need to take a retirement because of their fitness level. For

instace

Correct your spelling

instance

, the Turnine

sports

Correct your spelling

Sports

show examples

News covered that the 70%

Indian

Change preposition

of Indian

show examples

footballer prefer to take

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

retirement in their late 40's.

Thus

, the

sportmen

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

get only a certain period of

time

for their career and save money for their upcoming life.

On the other hand

, the other vital jobs

such

as engineers and teachers earn less because their working periods are immense than

sportmen

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

and they don't need any

God gifted

Add a hyphen

God-gifted

show examples

talent to pursue these jobs. To illustrate it, a score of teachers are doing their jobs in schools,

college

Fix the agreement mistake

colleges

show examples

and

univeristy

Correct your spelling

university

;

however

Add a comma

,however

show examples

only a few

sportmen

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

selected to play

for

Change preposition

show examples

international games.

For example

, a

survery

Correct your spelling

survey

conducted by

School

Correct article usage

the School

show examples

Union Of Asia in which they analyzed that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

interest

Change preposition

show examples

atking

Correct your spelling

taking

teacher

Replace the word

teaching

show examples

profession is significantly raised in

Add an article

the youngster

a youngster

show examples

youngster

Fix the agreement mistake

youngsters

show examples

. In conclusion, there is an undeniable fact that other necessary professions

Change the verb form

are

show examples

crucial for society. Despite

this

sportmen

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

got more because they got special talent

Change preposition

from

show examples

God and their career

time

is less.

Submitted by taniamall786 on Fri Jun 23 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
39Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

259 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Successful sports professionals earn a great deal more than people in other important professions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Alternative energy sources that use the natural power of the wind, wave and sun are too expensive and complicated to replace the coal, oil and gas that we use to power our cities and transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people think that governments should do more to make their citizens eat a healthy diet. Others believe that individuals must take responsibility for their own diet and health. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that finding a job satisfaction is considered the most important thing for the young generation nowadays. Do you agree or disagree with this viewpoint?

in many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly pepole.