Some people think it is better for children to have many short holidays during the year. Others believe that it would be beneficial to have fewer, longer vocations. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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One of the social concerns today relates to short or long
holidays
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.
While
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it is widely believed that it is better for
children
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to have many short
holidays
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during the
year
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,
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
believe that it would be beneficial to have fewer, longer vacations. In my opinion, both of the above have their own benefits. On the one hand, it is argued that it is better for
children
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to have many short
holidays
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during the
year
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. The main reason for
this
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view is that
student
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students
show examples
will have a
change
Correct your spelling
chance
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to take a rest after studying hard and prepare for the next program. It
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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also
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help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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children
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reduce stress during
they
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their
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vacation because they won’t need to do homework or any school progress.
For example
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, learners in any school in America will have short
break
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breaks
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over
years
Correct article usage
the years
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, so the homework will not
pressing
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press
be pressing
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them.
On the other hand
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, it is strongly by others that having fewer, longer vacations will have more advantages. People often have
this
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opinion because they think that
children
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would
be have
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have
show examples
long
Add an article
a long
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time to rest after
the
Correct article usage
a
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year
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of knowledge.
Futhermore
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Furthermore
, kids will have
long
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a long
show examples
time with their families,
travel
Correct word choice
and travel
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to
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apply
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somewhere with
families
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family
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members.
For instance
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, Vietnamese
children
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will have 2 big
holidays
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is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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Lunar New
Year
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and summer. They said that they feel comfortable during
they
Correct your spelling
the
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holidays
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. They spend more time
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
familes
Correct your spelling
families
family
,
friends
Correct word choice
and friends
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during the long
terms
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term
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holiday.
Inconclusion
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In conclusion
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,
have
Wrong verb form
having
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many short
holidays
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during the
year
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will have some
benefit
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benefits
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, but fewer, longer
holiday
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holidays
show examples
will have some
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
too. In my opinion, it would be better if the
children
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have longer
vacation
Fix the agreement mistake
vacations
show examples
.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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