Some people think it is better for children to have many short holidays during the year. Others believe that it would be beneficial to have fewer, longer vocations. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

One of the social concerns today relates to short or long
holidays
.
While
it is widely believed that it is better for
children
to have many short
holidays
during the
year
,
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
believe that it would be beneficial to have fewer, longer vacations. In my opinion, both of the above have their own benefits. On the one hand, it is argued that it is better for
children
to have many short
holidays
during the
year
. The main reason for
this
view is that
student
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students
show examples
will have a
change
Correct your spelling
chance
show examples
to take a rest after studying hard and prepare for the next program. It
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
also
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
children
reduce stress during
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
vacation because they won’t need to do homework or any school progress.
For example
, learners in any school in America will have short
break
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breaks
show examples
over
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
, so the homework will not
pressing
Change the verb form
press
be pressing
show examples
them.
On the other hand
, it is strongly by others that having fewer, longer vacations will have more advantages. People often have
this
opinion because they think that
children
would
be have
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have
show examples
long
Add an article
a long
show examples
time to rest after
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
year
of knowledge.
Futhermore
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Furthermore
, kids will have
long
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a long
show examples
time with their families,
travel
Correct word choice
and travel
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
somewhere with
families
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family
show examples
members.
For instance
, Vietnamese
children
will have 2 big
holidays
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
Lunar New
Year
and summer. They said that they feel comfortable during
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
holidays
. They spend more time
to
Change preposition
with
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familes
Correct your spelling
families
family
,
friends
Correct word choice
and friends
show examples
during the long
terms
Change the noun form
term
show examples
holiday.
Inconclusion
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In conclusion
show examples
,
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
many short
holidays
during the
year
will have some
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
, but fewer, longer
holiday
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holidays
show examples
will have some
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
too. In my opinion, it would be better if the
children
have longer
vacation
Fix the agreement mistake
vacations
show examples
.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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