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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think the government should support artists like painters, musicians, and poets, while others believe this wastes money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #government #support #artists #painters #musicians #poets #wastes #money
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Supporting
people
Use synonyms
 who are interested in artificial things by the government is a considerable opinion for some
people
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.
On the contrary
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, others are against
this
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 purpose because they think it wastes money. It is supported because supporters think
art
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 is required for
improvement
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. I believe that
art
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 is important as as other things which are encouraged by the government.
To begin
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 with, the most essential reason for the against is they do not define
art
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 as an activator of progress. To clarify, spending on
art
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 should be spent on subjects which directly affect
improvement
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due to
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 their thoughts . To sum extent, it is a considerable offer because they prefer education or social helps
instead
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 of unnecessary ones
such
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 as painting or poetry.
However
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,
according to
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the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
my belief it should not be seen as a waste of money.
This
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 is partly
due to
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 the correlation between artificial
improvement
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 levels and countries' development levels.
For
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example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 countries which have a high amount of reputation in sciences and welfare generally have a see of
people
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 who are extremely high-quality artists.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 want artists to be encouraged by the state because of their key roles in society and essential disciplines.
Obviously
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,Obviously
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 they have been thinking arts have been connected with
science
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.
According to
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 their
perspective
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,perspective
show examples
art
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 can be used for
science
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 like Da Vince did. From my
aspect
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,aspect
show examples
 it is a sound idea because there are a lot of examples of using
art
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 in
science
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 ,especially in the Renaissance. In light of examples that happened in
Renaissance
Correct article usage
the Renaissance
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 other developments can not be thought
without
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of without
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 the effects of
art
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. In conclusion, despite the fact that some individuals think the government should help artists others disagree with that aim. Spending taxes in order to
art
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 means wasted money.
Thus
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 they do not accept it might have benefits. In my
estimation
Add a comma
,estimation
show examples
 they are wrong because
science
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 is not only key for
improvement
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 but
also
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 arts play crucial roles.
Submitted by yunussemreozkaya on

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