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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the pie charts show the electricity generated in germany and france from all sources and renewables in the year 2009. summarize the information and make comparison.

the pie charts show the electricity generated in germany and france from all sources and renewables in the year 2009. summarize the information and make comparison.
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The pie chart gives information about how much
electricity
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generated
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was generated
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 from renewable and all other
sources
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 in
Germany
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 and
France
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 in 2009.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be said that there is a huge difference among these countries’ types of
sources
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. In
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Germany
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,Germany
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 conventional thermal was mostly used for
electricity
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 generation but in
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France
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,France
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 it was used less than renewable and nuclear. The first noticeable aspect of the data given in the graph is that both of the countries’
electricity
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 depended on one kind of source. In
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Germany
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,Germany
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 conventional thermal
sources
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 got the first rank with roughly 60 per
cent
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. In
France
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 Nuclear
sources
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 led to the other
sources
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 with 76 per
cent
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 in the given specific year. Another prominent aspect of the data given in the chart is that renewable
sources
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 took up almost the same area in the pie chart. But there are differences between the two countries’ details about renewable
sources
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 use except solar
sources
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. Solar
sources
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 were used
almost
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at almost
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 the same rates. Wind and biomass
sources
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 provided 77 per
cent
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 of
Germany
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's
Electricity
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 generation. In
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France
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,France
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 80 per
cent
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 of
electricity
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 generation was provided by hydroelectric.

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, sources, germany, france, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gives" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "provided" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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