Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes ( for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #community #service #part #school #programmes #charity #neighborhood #sports #children

Nowadays, volunteering for

community

service

seems to be a helpful activity. It is said that working in

community

service

for free should be a part of high school programmes for

pupils

. It is believed that

children

can learn from helping

others

. Personally,

this

belief is agreeable and sensible.

Children

will learn from working with

others

, and

children

can have more management skills as well. There is reason to support

this

belief. To start with,

pupils

are able to learn other skills from helping

community

service

. They can learn to deal with other

people

. Since working in

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

community

service

needs to

communicate

Wrong verb form

communicating

show examples

and

comprehend

Wrong verb form

comprehending

show examples

with other

people

, they can learn to deal and communicate with

others

In addition

, they can

also

learn to

sacrifice

. Working in

this

program requires a high

sacrifice

Pupils

need to

sacrifice

their

time

and energy for working for

others

This

means that they will learn to

sacrifice

for other

people

Moreover

, working in

community

service

can

also

help improve the environment and

neighborhood

Change the spelling

neighbourhood

show examples

Children

can

use

their

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

time

to help develop the

community

Also

, the

community

gains the benefit as well.

While

children

help develop

neighborhoods

Change the spelling

neighbourhoods

show examples

, communities become better areas.

In addition

pupils

are able to

use

their

time

efficiently. Apart from learning in the classroom,

children

can learn to

use

their

time

with effective

activities

Therefore

children

take their

time

with helpful

activities

On the other hand

, some

people

are concerned that

children

will not focus on their

lesson

Fix the agreement mistake

lessons

show examples

and affect their learning

time

This

will not happen if

children

manage their

time

Children

can

also

learn to prioritize the main task, and they can try to manage their

activities

This

can help

children

to manage their

time

for learning and working, which is a skill

that is

required in their future. In conclusion, volunteering

community

service

children

is an effective program.

Children

can learn a lot from working on these

activities

. They can learn to deal with

others

and to

sacrifice

their

time

to work for other

people

Also

, the

neighborhood

Change the spelling

neighbourhood

show examples

will be improved.

Moreover

children

can

use

their

time

efficiently with effective

activities

for the

community

Submitted by dondollaraus on Mon Jun 26 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

357 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes ( for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

The popularity of online education has grown significantly in the recent years.Do you think this positive or negative development.

In some societies the number of crimes committed by teenagers is growing. What are the reasons for this trend? And what possible solutions could reduce this issue?

Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?