The chart below shows information about students studying six main subjects at a US university in 2010.

#information #students #six #subjects #university

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The bar chart illustrates the number of pupils taking part in 6 key majors at a university in the US in the year 2010. Generally,

while

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finance attracted the largest total of students, the opposite was true for engineering.

Besides

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, more males chose to study mathematics and economics,

whereas

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females found accounting

as well as

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marketing more fascinating to learn. As can be seen, Finance was the most popular major. Boys and girls participating in finance shared the same percentage, with 225 students.

However

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while

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engineering

also

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saw an equal sum of both genders, it stood at only 50.

It is clear that

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male individuals were more interested in Math and Economics as the number of students attending stood at 200 and 150 respectively. Meanwhile, only over 50 females chose these 2 majors.

By contrast

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, accounting and marketing seemed likely to be more suitable for girls. About 200 female pupils joined in the former subject, compared to 175 male counterparts.

Likewise

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, The latter subject attracted 125 girls

while

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the figure for boys was only 75.

Submitted by danphamngocha on Tue Jun 27 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

175 words

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The chart below shows information about students studying six main subjects at a US university in 2010.

some people say that main environmental problems of our time are due to lack of some specific species of plants and animals. Other says that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is a problem about a traffic on roads around the world. It is undeniable that transportation by the car has become an essential part of our life. However, these days it become much difficult and create a traffic jam.

Some people think that government should change they way individual live, while others believe that they should choose the way themselves. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

The graphic indicates the gender ratio of teachers in six kinds of UK education in 2010.