The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease the violent crimes in society. What extent Do you Agree or Disagree ??

#government #control #amount #violence #films #television #decrease #crimes #society

In the modern ,era people do not interested in films or TV shows without

violence

However

, authorities can control

violence

from

movies

and television

due

Change preposition

apply

show examples

reducing

Wrong verb form

reduce

show examples

crime

in society. I largely agree with

this

notion

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

because it

is influences

Change the verb form

influences

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. There are a lot of types

Change preposition

of violence

show examples

violence

Replace the word

violent

show examples

scene

Fix the agreement mistake

scenes

show examples

shoot

Replace the word

shot

show examples

movies

or television so young people

are easily influence

Change the verb form

are easily influenced

show examples

by watching

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

. To explain it more, authorities should give proper guidance to viewers before the

the

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

movie

Change preposition

apply

show examples

which they cannot do that type of activity.

Secondly

, nowadays youth want to watch only thriller

movies

such

as murder

scenes

, rape

scenes

gangster

Fix the agreement mistake

gangsters

show examples

, and terrorist.

Due to

,that their mindset starts working like a psycho.

For instance

, the OTT platform revealed that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

90% of the audience

Correct subject-verb agreement

likes

show examples

to watch only action

movies

, they do not like horror or love

movies

As a result

crime

rates are increasing day by day all over the globe.

Moreover

, censor boards are responsible for

this

violence

in every country. In more detail, If a

movie

director

released

Wrong verb form

releases

show examples

their

movie

in the the theatre, it should be certified by the censor board. The censor board should remove the adult

scene

Fix the agreement mistake

scenes

show examples

or more violent

scenes

from the

movie

Change preposition

apply

show examples

doing

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will be beneficial for reducing

crime

in society.

In addition

this

, in

movies

, heroes or heroines live a luxurious lifestyle

due to

which, youth are

influence

Wrong verb form

influenced

show examples

by them and commit a

crime

for money.

For example

, India News revealed that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

20 to 30% of prisoners commit

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

crimes, and they were influenced by watching

movies

or web series. In conclusion, authorities cannot stop

violence

without public support but censor

board

Fix the agreement mistake

boards

show examples

also

contribute to their work

such

as cutting some

violence

, nudity or many other

scenes

Submitted by arshpreetmalkana on Thu Jun 29 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure the introduction presents a clear thesis statement and the conclusion synthesizes the main points.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples and elaborate on how violence in films and TV directly relates to increasing crime rates.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

294 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease the violent crimes in society. What extent Do you Agree or Disagree ??

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