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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#tourists #caribbean #island #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The graph highlights the
year
Use synonyms
 between 2010 and 2017
number
Use synonyms
 of visitors
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a Caribbean
island
Use synonyms
. In
total
Change the article
a total
the total
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 of
tourists
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
upwarding
Correct your spelling
upward
upwards
;
however
Linking Words
,
visitors
Correct article usage
the visitors
show examples
 staying on
Use synonyms
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 are decreasing in the rate. In a nutshell, In the
year
Use synonyms
2010
Add a comma
,2010
show examples
 no one stayed in the ship till 2013.
In other words
Linking Words
, the curve is showing the minus
visitor's
Change noun form
visitor
show examples
 percentage till the
year
Use synonyms
 2013. From 2014 staying in the ship's graph line was increasing till 2017.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
tourists
Use synonyms
 who spent their nights
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
island
Use synonyms
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 not very famous either in 2010;
Although
Linking Words
, From the
year
Use synonyms
 2013 people started passing their nights
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
island
Use synonyms
. And,
this
Linking Words
 trend was
upwarding
Correct your spelling
upward
upwards
 till 2014. Unless, in the
year
Use synonyms
 2016 the trending was failed
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 1.25
million
Use synonyms
.
Whereas
Linking Words
 visitor
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the ships was 1.5
million
Use synonyms
 in the same
year
Use synonyms
. Between 2015 to 2016
Use synonyms
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
tourists
Use synonyms
 who stayed
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the ships and who spent their nights
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
island
Use synonyms
 are intersecting
each
Change preposition
with each
show examples
 other. When the
number
Use synonyms
 of percentage of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people who stayed
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
island
Use synonyms
 was
decreaed
Correct your spelling
decreased
created
 by .25
million
Use synonyms
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
visitor's
Change noun form
visitors
show examples
 percentage was increased by .50
million
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, in total the
number
Use synonyms
 of tourist trend was
uptrending
Correct your spelling
trending
. From 2010 to 2017 the rate of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourists
Use synonyms
 was 1
million
Use synonyms
 to 3.5
million
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by kaynath87 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words year, number, island, tourists, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuating trend
  • initially
  • significant increase
  • slight decline
  • momentary setback
  • steady increase
  • minor fluctuations
  • reaching a peak
  • moderate growth
  • notable growth
  • surge in popularity
  • seasonal or yearly factors
  • stagnation
  • growing appeal
  • visitors worldwide
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