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Writing Samples /
Band 5

◼️Governments should be responsible for funding and controlling scientific research rather than private organizations. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#◼️governments #research #organizations
As an experience, I would choose
trying
Change the verb form
to try
show examples
 to manage without my phone for a week. The phone is a huge part of my life. I do everything with it,
how
Correct word choice
as
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 a lot of people in the modern world
.
Add a missing verb
do.
show examples
 Of course, it is impossible to imagine, but I try to
represent
Correct pronoun usage
itrepresent
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. The first main thing which I
using
Wrong verb form
use
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 in my device is the alarm clock. I have the several times
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because I can’t wake up from the first time. If I put an alarm clock in
watch
Add an article
the watch
a watch
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, I wouldn’t put
the
Correct pronoun usage
it the
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 second time
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the morning. The second important thing
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is
a music
Remove the article
music
a piece of music
show examples
. I do everything with the music: work, cleaning, do
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sport,
walk
Correct word choice
and walk
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. I haven’t
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
any devices which be able to translate my lovely songs to wireless headphones. It seems not a big problem, but I believe, that without
this
 option the surrounding becomes boring and
gray
Change the spelling
grey
show examples
.
Also
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
music is my communication with friends, we change
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new trends and
composition
Fix the agreement mistake
compositions
show examples
 with each other and discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
this
 topic very often. The third thing, of course,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is my job. I’m
architect
Add an article
an architect
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 and I live among
technique
Fix the agreement mistake
techniques
show examples
. In
this
 case, the phone should be with me all day (and sometimes
night
Change preposition
at night
show examples
). I must be online,
deal
Correct word choice
and deal
show examples
 with my bosses, contractors,
colleagues
Correct word choice
and colleagues
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. Inevitably, I would be online even
in
Change preposition
during
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 my vacation. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
addition, the camera is
also
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 basic thing in my work. I can’t imagine what I would do without
this
, how I could share or
describing
Wrong verb form
describe
show examples
 the elements or references with my colleagues. In conclusion, I would say, that the experience is unbelievable.
On the other hand
, I wonder to try to do
this
, but I know that it
is increase
Change the verb form
increases
show examples
 my anxiety because I would
out
Add a missing verb
be out
show examples
 of touch. Probably, it is a main thought that
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
humanity thoroughly becomes attached to the phones, the computers, the technique
devises
Replace the word
devices
show examples
.
Submitted by dulskywork on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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