The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed.
The table graph illustrates the document about the police
budget
between 2017 and 2018. Additionally
, the pie chart indicates how the money was spent out by percent
. Change the spelling
per cent
Overall
, the national government was peak point but other sources were
hit a low Unnecessary verb
apply
at
both years. All of the police Change preposition
in
budget
was upward trend which lead
to Wrong verb form
led
high
total Correct article usage
a high
budget
since 2017. However
, salaries were paid the most but decreasing used
Wrong verb form
decreased
while
technology
is
rising. Wrong verb form
was
To begin
with, the national government and other sources were
increased by 2.3 and 0.5 Unnecessary verb
apply
million
pounds
respectively in 2018. The local taxes also
risen
in money with 11.1 Wrong verb form
rose
million
pounds
in this
1 year
process. Add a hyphen
1-year
Moreover
, total
price Correct article usage
the total
budget
has become 318.6 million
pounds
which increasing
13.9 Wrong verb form
will increase by
million
pounds
from 2017. Moving to the pie chart of how the money was paid, the salaries reached a peak at 75% in 2017 and more than 2018
by 6%. Change preposition
in 2018
Moreover
, the technology
was the lowest percent at 8% which is less than the technology
in 2018 almost by 2 times. Lastly
, the
buildings and transport were the same Correct article usage
apply
percent
at 17% in bothReplace the word
percentage
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
,
and more than Remove the comma
apply
technology
in 2018 by 3%.Submitted by phirayapimp on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words budget, technology, million, pounds with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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