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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the cause? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

#children #hours #smartphones #development
In our modern world, spending a lot of time on mobile
phones
 each day is been common in childhood as it is easier to access the facility devices. In my opinion, the use of technology equipment could have an impact on
children
’s minds.
This
 essay will explain the negative way of overusing
smartphones
 in
children
. First of all, the primary cause of mobile
phones
 being used by young
children
 is parents not having time to take care of their
children
.
For example
, more and more parents get to work early, and
then
 they need to work hard all day. Which means
children
 will not have adults to supervise them.
Consequently
, young
children
 might tend to be addicted the electric devices.
Secondly
, the entertainment applications in
smartphones
 as fighting enemies and cooking meal games are built
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
attractive
Replace the word
attract
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several
children
.
For instance
, my little brother usually prefers to spend
time-fighting
Correct your spelling
time fighting
show examples
 the game as ROV on mobile
phones
 rather than playing with toys. Using telephones might impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
childhood period as a lack of social skills and health diseases. To illustrate, the aged of various young
children
 are faced
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
obesity because they do not have physical activities with other friends and just play with their mobile
phones
 on their beds.
Moreover
, they
also
 misunderstand social skills as they do not learn how to interact with other
children
 and the oldest people in the real world.
Also
, it affects the learning process, especially in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
primary school
children
 because they should try hard and concentrate on their practices, but
smartphones
 do not permit them to concentrate. In conclusion, It can be said that
smartphones
 will help to find interesting information, but it has many impacts on
children
.
Therefore
, parents should have limitations on their
children
’s usage and be careful about accessing the internet by
children
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
playing violent games.
Submitted by phirayapimp on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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