Some hold the view that ideas and information should be completely open, and there should be no controls on what people can read and watch in the media Do you agree with this view, or do you think that in some circumstances government should limit the freedom of the media.

There are
people
who tend to believe that the
information
and
news
each individual
read
Correct subject-verb agreement
reads
show examples
and
watch
Correct subject-verb agreement
watches
show examples
on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
should not be controlled. In my opinion, I think that in some special cases, the
government
should have some freedom limitation of the media.
Firstly
, the most popular circumstance that should be intervented is that the users of the
information
are children and teenagers. These media consumers are not fully
awared
Correct your spelling
aware
of the potential risk of misleading and unconfirmed online
information
.
Moreover
, they are not likely to have the ability to identify the prestige and qualified source of
information
or verify the
news
they read online.
This
can lead to the result that their privacy and safety can be
threated
Correct your spelling
treated
threatened
.
For instance
, teenagers detest getting vaccinated because of the spreading of inaccurate
news
about
Correct article usage
the COVID19
show examples
COVID19
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
vaccine causes a great number of dangerous side effects to
people
.
Secondly
, there are some sensitive topics that I
believed
Wrong verb form
believe
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should be reasonably restricted
such
as
politic
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politics
show examples
. On the internet, there are all kinds of
people
in the society
therefore
there are various political
point
Fix the agreement mistake
points
show examples
of view.
People
with extreme
belief
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beliefs
show examples
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
their political
idea
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ideas
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
likely to spread hate toward the
government
in different ways on social media. The biggest consequence
can happened
Verb problem
apply
show examples
is that the public
tend
Change the verb form
tends
show examples
to be persuaded by
those
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
hate speech and begin to fight against the
government
. The final result is that the country can not develop sustainably. In conclusion,
news
and
information
should not be fully open. How the
government
limit these depends on what kind of
news
and how each individual
consume
Change the verb form
consumes
show examples
these ideas.
Submitted by macgicongkhaingoha on

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Task Response
The essay provides a clear opinion and addresses the prompt by discussing the need for government control over the media in specific circumstances. It presents relevant arguments to support the stance.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is well-structured with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph focuses on a specific point related to the topic. However, some areas could benefit from smoother transitions and a stronger link between ideas.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fundamental rights
  • Freedom of expression
  • Access to information
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Well-informed
  • Accountability
  • Transparency
  • National security
  • Public order
  • Morality
  • Misinformation
  • Fake news
  • Propaganda
  • Vulnerable groups
  • Inappropriate content
  • Regulation
  • Democratic society
  • Responsible media
  • Social harmony
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