Some people think that public health is responsibility of the government while others believe that individuals should be responsible for the own health. This is both the views and give your opinion

#people #health #responsibility #government #individuals

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The virtue of good health is desired by all humans.

However

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, there are split opinions on who should be held accountable for public health. A group of

people

Use synonyms

believe that it is the

government

Use synonyms

's duty to safeguard the health of the citizens

whereas

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some think it is one's own lookout. I assert that individuals themselves are solely responsible for their well-being. Undoubtedly, all young adults are well aware of both the positive and negative effects of their habits.

For example

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, most youngsters know the harmful side effects of smoking

as well as

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drinking yet continue to do so.

Besides

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this

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, health-conscious

people

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are not only healthy but

also

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exercise regularly.

This

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proves that even without the authorities' interference one can live a disease-free life.

Moreover

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, the legislature can not form a law which makes exercise mandatory for all citizens.

This

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is because most

people

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either works long shift which gives them no time for extra-curriculars or lack enough financial support to join gyms.

This

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is true for majority of the middle-class families.

On the

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contrary

Add a comma

,contrary

show examples

a school of thought claims that the cabinet should pass a law banning tobacco farming which will not only decrease the number of users but

also

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prevent pathologies

such

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as cancer.

Furthermore

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, imposing heavy taxes on liquor can reduce its consumers

along with

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its manufacturers.

Apart from

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this

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, the

government

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must initiate de-addiction centres to help the community

that is

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already trapped by these evils.

For instance

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, in many public ,hospitals the

government

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have started alcohol de-addiction

along with

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opioid de-addiction centres.

Thus

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to conclude

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, we can say that role of both the

government

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and the person themself is necessary to ensure a healthy lifestyle.

However

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, I affirm that the Major role in living a disease-free life is played by the

people

Use synonyms

themselves.

Submitted by chehlsychristie947 on Tue Jul 04 2023

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17
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

298 words

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