IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

In their advertising, business nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative developement?

#business #emphasise #products #developement
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It is a common belief that manufacturers usually focus on the new features of
thier
Correct your spelling
their
the
 product in terms of advertising. Since advertising is one of
powerful
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the powerful
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 strategies to appeal
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consumers
Change preposition
to consumers
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 to buy
products
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, I
personly
Replace the word
personally
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 agree with
this
Linking Words
 trend.
To begin
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 with, making revenue is the first goal of all
cooperations
Fix the agreement mistake
cooperation
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 in the capital society. To achieve
this
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 goal, manufacturers should make good
products
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 in the first place and
also
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 introduce them effectively to
people
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 who
willing
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are willing
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 to pay. It is evident that
brandnew
Correct your spelling
brand new
brand-new
 things are easy to catch potential
consumers
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' eyes and make
people
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to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
buy the
products
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.
For
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From
show examples
Use synonyms
consumers'
Correct article usage
the consumers'
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 side,
people
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 tend to delve into the product before buying things they need. It is true that advertisement is the best way for
people
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 to collect information in a short time.
Consumers
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 can recognize what is new in those
products
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 easily and it helps them to make choices properly.
To sum up
Linking Words
, emphasising new things about the product in
advertisement
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the advertisement
an advertisement
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 is
effetive
Correct your spelling
effective
to
Change preposition
for
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 both companies and
consumers
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. Customers can get useful information and Businesses can earn profit.
Submitted by ku-hmi on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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