IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #levels #education #schools #universities #time #facts #skills
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some individuals say that in all
leves
Correct your spelling
levels
 of
Use synonyms
education
Add an article
the education
show examples
 system, from elementary schools to tertiary
education
Use synonyms
,
students
Use synonyms
spends
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
 too much time on learning academic
facts
Use synonyms
 and not sufficient on learning practical
skills
Use synonyms
. I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement, and I believe
this
Linking Words
 trend can have
a negative impacts
Correct the article-noun agreement
a negative impact
negative impacts
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
personal
Correct article usage
the personal
show examples
 and professional lives of
students
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with , there are several reasons why I believe that teaching
students
Use synonyms
 in all levels of
education
Use synonyms
 more theoretical
facts
Use synonyms
 than practical
skills
Use synonyms
 can have
detrimetal
Correct your spelling
detrimental
 consequences on the
Use synonyms
students
Change noun form
student's
students'
show examples
 personal and professional
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
. Regarding personal
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
 is extremely substantial for
Use synonyms
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
 curriculum to concentrate on practical
skills
Use synonyms
 namely, public speaking, communication,
solving
Correct word choice
and solving
show examples
 problems
instead
Linking Words
 of more
focus
Replace the word
focused
show examples
 teach
students
Use synonyms
 academic
facts
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
math, biology,
physics
Correct word choice
and physics
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 is because these practical
skills
Use synonyms
 can contribute to
enhance
Wrong verb form
enhancing
show examples
 the confidence among
students
Use synonyms
 and prepare them for real
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, public speaking allows
students
Use synonyms
 to share their ideas around the world
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and helps them to become more
confidence
Replace the word
confident
show examples
. In terms of professional
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
companies prefer applicants who have real experiences rather
academic
Correct word choice
than academic
show examples
 ones.
This
Linking Words
 is
due to
Linking Words
 the fact
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
, the companies do not
need
Add the particle
toneed
show examples
 spend a considerable amount of money in order to
tranining
Correct your spelling
training
 new employees to gain real experience.
As a result
Linking Words
, the curriculum in levels of
education
Use synonyms
 should focus teach
students
Use synonyms
 enough real experience
instead
Linking Words
 of
concentrat
Correct your spelling
concentrating
concentrate
 only on academic
facts
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, schools and universities should make contracts with many private organizations namely, Apple, General Electric,
Amazon
Correct word choice
and Amazon
show examples
 in order to
training
Change the verb
train
show examples
students
Use synonyms
real
Change preposition
in real
show examples
 experiences
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 marketing, cashier,
sells
Change the verb form
sell
show examples
.
To sum up
Linking Words
 , I strongly believe, all levels of
education
Use synonyms
 only
foucs
Correct your spelling
focus
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 academic
facts
Use synonyms
 and do not
enough
Add a missing verb
have enough
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
practical
skills
Use synonyms
, I think
this
Linking Words
 trend can have harmful effects
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
in
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
personal and professional lives of
students
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by faiz3177 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • rote memorization
  • practical skills
  • adaptable skills
  • critical thinking
  • balanced approach
  • problem-solving
  • decision-making
  • workforce readiness
  • real-life challenges
  • technological advancements
  • information management
  • creativity hindrance
  • lifelong learning
  • skill development
What to do next:
Look at other essays: