The bar chart gives.information about how many Japanese tourists travelled overseas over a 10-year period from1985 to 1995,while the line graph illustrates Australia 's share of Japanese tourist market during the same timefirame
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The bar chart gives information about how many
Japanese
tourists travelled overseas over a 10-year period
from 1985 to 1995, while
the line graph illustrates Australia`s share of Japanese
tourist market during the same timeframe.
Correct article usage
the Japanese
Overall
, the number of Japanese
people travelling abroad followed a consistent upward trend, with only one slight decline in early
1990s, and showed the highest figure Change the article
the early
at the end
of the period
. Likewise
, the percentage of tourists from Japan to Australia increased gradually, regardless of a sudden dip in the middle of the period
.
In 1985, only around 5 million
Japanese
individuals travelled abroad, the least number throughout the entire period
. In the following five years, however
, this
number more than doubled to about 11 million
before experiencing a negligible drop to just over 10 million
in 1991. Then
, there was consistent growth in the next four years to finally
peak at 15 million
in 1995.
As for Australia`s share of Japan`s tourist market, there was a similar continuous growing pattern. The percentage of Japanese
travelers
who visited Australia saw a dramatic rise from the start of the Change the spelling
travellers
period
, increasing from only 2% in 1985 to approximately 5% in 1989. Having seen a sudden fall to almost 4% in the following year, the figure showed a gradual upward trend until 1994 and reached the
peak of just over 6%. Correct article usage
a
Lastly
, in 1995, this
decreased slightly to 6%.Submitted by ieltsteaching0 on
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words japanese, period, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "gives" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just over" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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