some people beleive that it is important to keep the home and the work place tidy and organized. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
I strongly agree
with
Change preposition
that
show examples
it is important to keep the home and workplace
place
Use synonyms
organized and tidy because it has lots of benefits. My viewpoint is disuse blow.
Firstly
Linking Words
, there are so many advantages of organising a
place
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as if a
person
Use synonyms
wants to find a thing
then
Linking Words
he or she can easily get that.
For example
Linking Words
, if a
person
Use synonyms
wants a file from her office desk and it is not organized
then
Linking Words
it will be difficult to find that. If
things
Use synonyms
would
Verb problem
are
show examples
not clear and if someone comes to a
place
Use synonyms
that would not look good. People should
also
Linking Words
keep updating with materials
Linking Words
also
Rephrase
apply
show examples
as well as
Linking Words
use the better options to keep organised.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the well-organized
place
Use synonyms
will give a good vibe
also
Linking Words
.
For example
Linking Words
, if a lady in the house wants a newspaper and if his house is neat and clear
then
Linking Words
it would be easy for her to search for that thing
things
Use synonyms
.
Things
Use synonyms
should be kept in their own
place
Use synonyms
. Keeping
things
Use synonyms
properly is a good habit. If a
person
Use synonyms
will
Verb problem
does
show examples
things
Use synonyms
properly,
which
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
will help them to remember where and at what
place
Use synonyms
it is put. Even, by organising
things
Use synonyms
exercises will be
also
Linking Words
done which is even good for a body. In conclusion, people should keep their
place
Use synonyms
neat and proper so that it would be helpful for them to manage their work properly. From my viewpoint and my opinion is that a
person
Use synonyms
should keep the
place
Use synonyms
clean. Keeping
things
Use synonyms
proper
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
much
Fix the agreement mistake
many
show examples
more benefits.
Submitted by purvametaliya99  on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Your essay shows a basic level of coherence and cohesion. There is an attempt to organize ideas, but they are not fully developed or linked together effectively. Aim for a clear and logical structure throughout the essay, with well-connected paragraphs and cohesive linking phrases.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a limited level of task achievement. Although you address the topic, your response lacks depth and does not fully develop or support your ideas. Make sure to provide clear and comprehensive ideas, with relevant specific examples to support your arguments.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • efficiency
  • mental well-being
  • professionalism
  • attention to detail
  • work-life balance
  • innovation
  • creativity
  • mental clutter
  • order and control
  • infrastructure
  • ergonomics
What to do next:
Look at other essays: