Shopping is become more and more popular as leisure activity. However, some people feel that this has both positive and negative effects? Why is shopping so popular? What effects does its popularity have on individuals and on society?

#leisure #activity #people #effects #popularity #individuals #society

There are increasing numbers of shopping

mall

Fix the agreement mistake

malls

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around the world. If you have a chance to go to New York, Tokyo or London..., you will see many mega shopping malls there. One of the reasons why shopping become so popular is we want to show ourselves as rich, have a good life, more beautiful than others.

This

trend has an impact on individuals and society. Nowadays,many people have the tendency to buy stuff in online shopping and

also

in shopping

mall

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malls

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as well.

Firstly

the

Correct article usage

apply

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companies now are trying to advertise more of their new products in order to attract the customer. They advertised everywhere: in the street, on YouTube or on all social media.

Secondly

, online shopping company knows how to advertise what we need through our online history

such

as Amazon, they know how to increase selling the product. Everyone wants to prove themselves they are the best and sometimes they buy stuff without any need. Nowadays, we can call the trend of shopping "drug". If we see the young life right now, we will see they consume a lot of things

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

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with the old generation. Because now we produce a lot of stuff to consume and when they feel lonely or stressed, they will have the tendency to find something to cover up their loneliness or stress. Whenever we buy something, we will feel happy right away because the dopamine will increase after we receive something that we hope

Change preposition

for.

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That makes us consume more than we need.

To conclude

, I think we may to balance our shopping. We have to see do we need it or not before we buy it and we have to see our future through saving money.

Submitted by troihongbang on Tue Jul 11 2023

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

285 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

leisure activity
consumer culture
emotional satisfaction
consumerism
advertising influence
online shopping platforms
sense of pleasure
social interaction
boost the economy
compulsive shopping
materialism
environmental degradation
unsustainable demand
social inequalities
status through possessions

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Shopping is become more and more popular as leisure activity. However, some people feel that this has both positive and negative effects? Why is shopping so popular? What effects does its popularity have on individuals and on society?

Fully explain your ideas

It can be seen that you don't have free time to check my essay.

Plastic shopping bags contribute to the pollution of land and sea. Some people think they should be banned. Do you agree or disagree? and what can be done to reduce it?

Some people believe that certain old buildings should be preserved more than others. What types of old buildings should be preserved? Do you think the advantages of preserving old buildings outweigh the disadvantages?

The main purpose of public libraries is to provide books, and they should not waste their limited resources and space on providing expensive hi-tech media such as computer software, videos and DVDs. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?