Today many people spend less and less time in their homes. What are the reasons for this? What are the effects of this trend an individuals and society?

#people #time #homes #effects #trend #individuals #society

For decades, the number of folks who spend

time

home

has decreased dramatically. There is a sharp drop in the

amount

Change the quantifier

number

show examples

of hours which are spent at

home

rather than outside. In

this

essay, I will look at the reasons for

this

along with

pointing out the effects on either individuals or society.

Firstly

, one of the main reasons for

this

progress is recreational hobbies at which point make communities not only eager especially young generations but

also

senior citizens head to outdoor activities like cinema,

theater

Change the spelling

theatre

show examples

and so on.

Besides

this

decrease happens because of the increasing work

time

;

this

means over seventy per cent of employees' daily

time

spend

Change the form of the verb

spent

show examples

in the workplace

instead

of at

home

Furthermore

, investments in Entertainment sectors usurp the popularity of TV Programs and

thus

, TV series can not attract

watchers

Change noun form

watchers'

watcher's

show examples

attention to stay at their houses when they watch their favourite movies

as well as

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

have lovely conversations with family members.

Secondly

this

process has both positive and negative impacts on individuals and

also

society.

In other words

, overworking can lead to economic growth in the country and

hence

, enhances the quality of nations' lives.

Conversely

, it has devastating effects on family bonds since each person

Change preposition

show examples

a Family

spend

Change the verb form

spends

show examples

their

time

separately.

In addition

, not spending adequate

time

home

where

Correct word choice

which

show examples

is the only place for relaxation; communities afterwards confront mental illnesses like depression because they are always in a hurry in comparison with the past lifestyle. In conclusion, there is no doubt spending a lot of

time

outside

while

you have a lot of fun would bring mankind several positive aspects ;

nonetheless

, it would

leads

Change the verb form

lead

show examples

to several devastating problems if it does not occur in a balance.

Submitted by mehrdad.salahi2003 on Tue Jul 11 2023

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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16Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today many people spend less and less time in their homes. What are the reasons for this? What are the effects of this trend an individuals and society?

Include an introduction and conclusion

It is much easier to learn in a small class than in a larger one. To what extent that do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. However, others believe that schools are the place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own thoughts.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones.

Today, most people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? To what extent do you support this development?

As public safety is of the highest importance, it is often necessary to test new products on animals. It is better for a few animals to suffer from for human life to be placed at risk by untested products. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?