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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Global warming is one of the biggest threats humans face in the 21st Century and sea levels are continuing to rise at alarming rates. What problems are associated with this and what are some possible solutio

#threats #humans #face #st #century #sea #levels #rise #rates #solutio
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Nowadays mankind is dealing with a huge headache caused by global climate change , and the gradual increase of ocean levels has been frightening.
This
 essay will try to examine several problems caused by global warming and two elementary measures for tackling the problem. Global climate change
brings
Verb problem
has
show examples
 some negative effects on the population. The first and foremost problem of sea levels rising is the loss of human life. During the tsunami and floods, millions of residents in coastal areas
suffer
Wrong verb form
suffered
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 from injuries received
due to
 flooding,
also
 there
are
Wrong verb form
were
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 many cases when huge numbers of people
were dying
Wrong verb form
died
show examples
.
For instance
, the devastating Japan floods in 2018 took about 250 lives. Another trouble is the flooding of
local’s
Change noun form
local
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 businesses and houses, which can lead to the loss of people’s jobs and financial problems. Not all inhabitants are able to restore damage on their own without even a place to live. As an example, the socially vulnerable can not afford
a
Correct article usage
the
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 construction of a new home, having to stay at hostels that are expensive too. Turning to the ways
how
Rephrase
apply
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to tackle the issue of sea level, the headache is avoidable with some effort. A possible solution to
this
 issue is the establishment of shelters in order to provide temporary accommodation for those who lose a source of wage or places to live
as a result
 of widespread flooding. To illustrate, there are rooms, called “crisis rooms” intended for people who need urgent help not only during natural catastrophes but
also
 during accidents of violence.
In addition
, there should always be financial support from authorities to compensate for material losses. In some countries, organizations dealing with damages have been existing and assist victims with fulfilling their needs.
To sum up
, the increase in global temperature is the most challenging complication faced by people around the world.
However
, a viable solution could be used to concur with damage by arranging housing and the participation of every government in the global accidents which aim to reduce the harm of flooding.
Submitted by medetbaevk on

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coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and present, but the logical structure within paragraphs could be improved for better cohesiveness.
task achievement
You have provided a complete response to the task, but the development of your ideas and the use of relevant examples need improvement for a clearer and more comprehensive explanation of the problems and solutions related to global warming and rising sea levels.
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