It’s important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives, and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks out with the disadvantages?

The importance of taking

risks

, whether in personal or professional lives, was always debatable which now has become more controversial with many favours

whereas

others quibble about it. The below essay will discuss the pros and cons of taking

risks

and

further

conclude how its positives outweigh the negatives. On the one hand, risk-takers believe that it makes their life exciting and adventurous no matter if it is private or career-related.

Moreover

, people become more courageous

while

making daring decisions.

In addition

Change preposition

apply

show examples

, it enables a sense of satisfaction and achievement in an individual, when a risky decision turns favourable. Categorically discussing, people with

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strong mind and good

Change preposition

apply

show examples

decision-making take calculative

risks

which

consequently

favours them in most cases and

thus

encourage

Correct subject-verb agreement

encourages

show examples

them to retake the

risks

For instance

, if a person tries an adventurous activity like skydiving or paragliding, he outgrows their fear of

height

Fix the agreement mistake

heights

show examples

and

such

acheivement

Correct your spelling

achievement

eventually encourages him to try other risky activities.

On the other hand

, the disadvantages of

this

approach cannot be overlooked either.

Sometime

Replace the word

Sometimes

show examples

poor decision results

into

Change preposition

show examples

failures

Fix the agreement mistake

failure

show examples

and a person

feels

Change the verb form

feel

show examples

demotivated and loses self-esteem.

In addition

Change preposition

apply

show examples

, in

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

cases

Add a comma

,cases

show examples

risk might backfire which

consequently

, inculcate the feeling of insecurity and

lose

Replace the word

loss

show examples

of confidence and at worst might lead to cause of death. To exemplify, a light-hearted person

Correct word choice

who

show examples

dares to do any thrilling activity,

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

might cost his life. Henceforth, it is concluded that not all

risks

are worth taking. To recapitulate, the advantages of taking

risks

which

includes

Correct subject-verb agreement

include

show examples

excited

Replace the word

exciting

show examples

and thrilling lifestyle, are great indeed.

However

, the disadvantages might result

into

Change preposition

show examples

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of confidence and self-esteem, at worse might become a cause of death and these cons are too dire to ignore.

Submitted by ssansar623 on Wed Jul 12 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It’s important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives, and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks out with the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Young people spend too much of their free time in shopping malls. This has a negative effect on young people and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Using computers and mobile phones in communication -> negative impact on reading and writing among young people, agree or disagree.

Many people think that to become a successful specialist it's better to choose a career early in life and never changer it later. To what extent do you agree with tis view. support your opinion with relevant examples.

Employers should give their staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to help employees get better at their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?