Some people think sending criminals to prison is an effective way to deal with them. Others think education and training are better. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

#people #criminals #prison #education

Some individuals believe sending

offenders

to jail is an efficient method to cope with them. Others feel

education

and training are best. I totally

agree

Add the particle

toagree

show examples

provide

education

and training for

criminals

are

effective

Add an article

an effective

show examples

way to deal

them

Change preposition

with them

show examples

instead

of putting them behind bars.

To begin

with, there are several reasons why I believe

offer

Wrong verb form

offering

show examples

education

and training for

offenders

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

better than

prison

Add an article

a prison

show examples

sentence.

Firstly

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

most imprisonment

focus

Correct subject-verb agreement

focuses

show examples

to punish

criminals

rather provide

education

and vocational training , which means when the

criminals

release they can face difficulties to find

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

jobs

Fix the agreement mistake

job

show examples

opprtunity

Correct your spelling

opportunity

This

is because

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

companies require from applicants qualifications

as well as

experiences

Fix the agreement mistake

experience

show examples

Therefore

, the

criminals

when they release can face poverty, which

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can motivate them

Correct your spelling

reoffeding

Correct your spelling

reoffending

in order to meet their family responsibilities.

Secondly

, providing better

education

for

criminals

best

Change the article

the best

show examples

method to teach

criminals

about

ethics

Replace the word

ethical

show examples

values and right and wrong.

This

due to

the fact

the

Correct your spelling

that

show examples

most of

Correct article usage

the criminlas

show examples

criminlas

Correct your spelling

criminals

have

low

Add an article

a low

show examples

level of

education

Consequently

provide

Wrong verb form

providing

show examples

education

can minimize the rate of crime

Change preposition

show examples

our

socity

Correct your spelling

society

Finanlly

Correct your spelling

Finally

offer

Replace the word

offering

show examples

training for

offenders

better

Add an article

a better

the better

show examples

method to

makes

Wrong verb form

make

show examples

criminals

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

more likely to get

a better jobs

Correct the article-noun agreement

a better job

better jobs

show examples

For example

, if the governments

offfer

Correct your spelling

offer

vocational training for

offenders

in , plumbing,

Correct word choice

and

show examples

electricity, which means

this

training

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

criminals

to have

good

Add an article

a good

show examples

professional life and escape from

povery

Correct your spelling

poverty

Therefore

this

training can demotivate

criminals

to commit their

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

To sum up

, I strongly believe that

offer

Wrong verb form

offering

show examples

education

and training are

Change the word

apply

show examples

better than

send

Wrong verb form

sending

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

criminals

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

prison, because

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

criminals

commite

Correct your spelling

commit

commute

their

due to

Correct article usage

show examples

lack of enough

education

, and

provide

Wrong verb form

providing

show examples

training for them can lift them from poverty.

Submitted by faiz3177 on Wed Jul 12 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
48Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
You are visiting a town where you once worked. Write to a friend you worked with there. Include the following in your letter: •Tell your friend about your life now. •Give him/her details of your visit. •Arrange how you can meet.
I hope this letter finds you in a radiant of health and great spirits. I am writing this letter to inform you that I have planned to visit Cambridge next week and I am so excited and ecstatic to see you .
4.5
band
Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
In these modern days, the development of technology is advanced and plays an important role in our life. Everyone will have some electronic gadgets such as smartphones, laptops and tablets. In addition, some children might spend a lot of time on their smartphones. In this essay, I will discuss the pros and cons of this case.
7
band
Whether or not someone achieves their aims is mostly by a question of luck. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Numerous individuals assert that luck plays a significant role in an individual's success. Although I acknowledge the influence of luck in assisting individuals in attaining their goals, I contend that diligent effort and unwavering determination are far more critical factors in driving an individual towards achievement.
4.5
band
Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Others think they should begin after 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In this era, there are some evidence of school allowing childern who is under 7 years of age to begin their formal education. It appears that some people argue that this phenomenon should not be happening. This essay attempts to shed light both arguments of this tendency.
6.5
band
Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?
It is uncommon to see many people use traditional tools of writing such as a pen or a pencil. The fundamental reason behind this can be attributed to technological advancements and this change in trend has more negative effects than positive outcomes.

Some people think sending criminals to prison is an effective way to deal with them. Others think education and training are better. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

You are visiting a town where you once worked. Write to a friend you worked with there. Include the following in your letter: •Tell your friend about your life now. •Give him/her details of your visit. •Arrange how you can meet.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Whether or not someone achieves their aims is mostly by a question of luck. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Others think they should begin after 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?