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Band 8

Some think that developing a successful career is more important than spending time with family and friends, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give our own opinion.

#think #career #time #friends
In our modern
world
, there is a controversial issue on whether the importance of a prosperous career is higher than focusing on relationships between relatives and peers.
This
 essay will compare and contrast both views
along with
 presenting my personal opinion
at the end
. On the one hand, in the materialistic
world
 we are living currently, having a profitable career can be a matter of life and death. In our modern society, it is almost impossible to survive
due to
 several reasons
such
 as buying necessary provisions for your family and clothes. The lack of sufficient financial support might even lead you to find yourself on the street, without shelter. The fact that nothing in
this
world
 can be obtained free of charge will make it quite essential for every individual to get a job that will let us survive in
this
 global village.
On the other hand
, it is undeniable that family bonds and friendship play an irreplaceable role in everyone's life. Even if one owns a good job, one cannot be happy without the aforementioned relationships. As a recent study has revealed, every third of the
world
's population is losing their family because of their addiction to their work.
For
this
 reason, personally, I think that the best way to deal with the problem is to keep a work-life balance so that we can benefit from both of them. Taking everything into consideration, it has become clear that though having a good career is a necessity in modern times for all of us, ties with our loved ones are no less significant as real happiness can only be achieved by their unity.
Submitted by aakhtamov on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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